Finally
by BubbleToes94
Summary: Ray/Neela. What happened after Shifting Equilibrium ended? Ray and Neela reunite... finally! Neela's POV.
1. Chapter 1

_Okay. So the show's finally over and we all know that Neela's in Baton Rouge with Ray. As a roomie fan, I'm glad we had Shane back to give us some closure. And I've had this idea in my mind for a while now. In my story, Neela's moving to Louisiana is a surprise and Ray did not know she was coming. I just had to whip this up before I went to bed tonite. There will be more if you guys think there should be, please review! it keeps me writing._

* * *

He looked like he was holding back tears as he had pensively approached me.

"Finally" he ducked his head down to look me in the eyes.

His eyes were full of raw emotion and shock.

"You really here?" He asks both apprehensively and hopefully.

I look up at him, tears now brimming in my eyes, and smile back at him.

"Yeah I really am." My response is definitive and I hope that with those four tiny words I have answered the millions of questions that have swarmed his mind these past few years about me and my feelings for him. A smile grows on his face and he pulls me into a tight embrace.

I hug him back with all of my might. I want him to know that I really mean it this time. This is about him and me and the finality of us.

He releases me and holds me at arm's length and looks into my eyes.

"This is a great surprise, I'm impressed." he says as he smirks at me and raises his eyebrows.

"I could tell by the double take you took when I came into the room" I reply cheekily.

"Yah you got me there..." He trails off, staring intensely at me.

_Staring_.

We are standing there just staring at one another. The background noise and the other bodies in the room have all melted away and it's just the two of us for a moment.

I want to jump up into his arms, wrap my legs around him and kiss him madly as I exclaim

"I missed you so much. I've had the longest most emotionally draining day ever but seeing you makes it all worth it!"

but we're in his place of work, his "office" so to speak and that would be highly unprofessional.

"Oh man, I've still got two hours of rehab appointments left today" Ray cuts into the moment sadly.

"I'm sorry, I can't cancel on my patients with this short notice" He apologizes as he glances back at the young man he'd been working with.

"Umm, wait here for a sec. Do not move." he orders me as he holds onto and tugs firmly at my wrists which are down by my sides before releasing them.

"Okay" I respond softly as I bite my lip when he turns to walk away. As he walks back to his patients he turns twice to look back at me, almost as though to make sure I'm still there, that I'm not some crazy apparition he's thought up in his mind, or perhaps he's scared that I will run. After all, that's what I seem to do best when it comes to Ray and me. I don't blame him for being insecure. But there will be no running this time.

I never let my eyes leave his body, his back, his strong and slender frame. I stare at him soaking in all of his rugged beauty as I wait for him to return. I do not move not even an inch, not my feet or anything, I stand rooted firmly in the same place that he left me, in the middle of the room awaiting his return. I'm breathing heavily, the magnitude of the moment sinking in.

_I'm finally here, I've finally done it. _

I've garnered a few glances now, his co-workers no doubt, wondering who I am and what's going on. But I don't care. I'm here for Ray, I'm here for us.


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks for the reviews! Hope you guys like it, more to come :)_

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His smile grows as he gets closer to me once again. "Okay, I think I can tear myself away for about fifteen minutes or so..."

He says as he gently takes hold of my elbow and guides me out of the room. We travel in silence for a while down a few hallways and corridors and he says "almost there" like I'm supposed to know what that means. He decides to cut into our silence and turns to look at me as I walk by his side

"So, how long do I have you for?" he asks.

"Hmm?" I murmur as I turn to look at him, having been caught up in my mind, I'd missed what he had just said to me.

"Uh, how long you in town?" he rewords his phrase and stutters as he make it more casual, and looks down at the ground as he awaits my response.

This isn't how I imagined it, the moment that I finally tell him I've moved here so I can be with him. I don't even know if there is a special someone else in his life right now. I've come on a dream and on a whim with a lot of hope.

"Uhhh" I falter and stop walking he continues on without me and soon notices my absence and turns back to see what is holding me up. "Neela?" he questions.

"Hi Ray" a chirpy voice from behind me sounds out and soon I see the body associated with it saunter by me. I only see her back but she's tall and blonde and no doubt beautiful.

"Hello Natalie" Ray offers a polite greeting but barely looks at her his eyes are focused intently on me. For a moment I remember when we were interns and Ray would sleep with anything that had a pulse. It's amazing how things have changed now. The man standing before me has no interest in this nurse or doctor, whoever this Natalie is. His eyes are on me.

"Sorry." I mumble as I run a few steps to catch up with him. It seems Ray has momentarily forgotten about the question he had just asked me. The one I haven't answered yet. We round a corner and I see we've reached the staff lounge. He scans his identification card through the lock and the door pops open. I follow him in and to his locker. He opens it quickly and turns to look at me as he says

"How'd you get here?"

"By plane" I offer confused.

"No silly, I mean how did you get here from the airport" he pinches my arm playfully and grins at my answer. I'm feeling lightheaded. Just being in his presence I can't think straight right now, I'm tired, drained and all I want is to feel his strong arms around me. I want him to hold me and never let go.

"Oh. Sorry. I have a rental" I shake my head at my stupidity.

"Alright..." he's fiddling with his keychain and pulling keys off of it. "I'm sure you're tired and want a warm shower, fresh change of clothes?" he starts, "Here is a key to my place and my car key, in my glove compartment you'll find my GPS, on my list of saved addresses number one is my home, use it to get to my place... my car it's right at the front of the staff parking lot, I've got a great spot... it's the silver Highlander" he winks at me and grins at his own humour over his handicapped parking space as he passes me the keys.

"Well, what number is your apartment?" I ask,

"Oh you'll know you are there when you get there, no worries. Shower, get comfortable, the spare bedroom is all yours. I'm off at five, should be home by six. I'll grab us some dinner on the way home" He smiles mysteriously at me

"Okaaay. No, I'll order us dinner. They still have Thai takeout down here right?" I question hopefully.

"You bet they do" he answers as he closes his locker and once again we are looking at each other.

_Staring_.

_Silence_.

I clear my throat uncomfortable at the attention he is paying me. He makes no move to touch me, we're all alone but he is being a complete gentleman, a great friend. Maybe I'm crazy, we are just friends. After all of this time can things actually work out between the two of us? I suspect he is waiting for me to make the first move. For me to confirm my intentions, my reasons for "visiting'.

"Hey, what's going on inside there?" he asks gently as he pats the top of my head.

"I'm sorry. I know I'm acting oddly, perhaps after I freshen up I will be better. I've had a very long day. Well you better get back to things right?' I respond uncomfortably

"Yah. I should" he answers, he looks disappointed at my answer. He's waiting to hear me say the words I need to say. I plan on telling him tonight, telling him that I've left everything back in Chicago with the hope of building a future here with him. We head out of the staff room and I follow him back to the physiotherapy room. As we walk back down the halls, I'm feeling brave and reach out and take his hand in mine. He squeezes my hand as soon as I take hold of his but he doesn't look down at me. He gently strokes the back of my hand with his thumb as we walk. When we get there we stand in front of the physio room for a moment.

"I'll see you in a few hours, make yourself at home eh? My place is your place" he says as he smiles at me.

"Okay, sounds good" I smile and go weak in the knees as he lifts the hand of mine he's holding to his lips and kisses it softly before releasing it and heading back to work. Again I find myself standing and staring at his retreating figure with baited breath.

_Time for that cold shower Neela_ I tell myself as I head to the elevator to make my way back down to the parking lot and to Ray's place.


	3. Chapter 3

_Again, Neela's POV. I know I may get caught up in some details here but this I really wish we got to see some of this take place between Ray/Neela before the show ended. I just enjoyed their interaction so much and their relationship is what got me started watching ER again as soon as I saw them together in Season 11 I thought they'd be perfect for each other. Who would've thought they'd drag out their relationship for four seasons! Thanks for the great reviews, I always appreciate your input and encouragement._

* * *

My mouth drops as I arrive at what the GPS is indicating to be my final destination. I slowly pull into the driveway and park the car. I take in the sight for a moment in awe. Before me is a beautiful, home as in a house... not an apartment but an actual house with its own driveway and yard, I can actually see grass, green and beautifully kept. The house is two storeys and gorgeous from the outside. All that's missing is the white picket fence outlining the property margins.

I'm impressed. I grab my carryon luggage and one of the smaller suitcases I've brought and head up the steps to the front porch.

The porch is spacious and has a wicker bench in the corner of it. I turn back before opening the door to take a look at Ray's street, it's appears to be a quiet little street with houses spread out along it all neatly maintained and equally beautiful. I slip the key Ray gave me into the door and head inside.

I'm expecting a bachelor pad, something similar to our apartment in Wicker Park but I'm pleasantly surprised. Yes the house desperately needs a woman's touch, which I'm glad to see but it's clean and very sterile looking. An antique looking wooden table fills the dining room and a comfortable squishy couch fills the den facing a huge plasma screen television mounted on the wall.

"_Of course, men._" I grin to myself as I spot his enormous TV.

Ray's record and CD collection is neatly arranged in the corner of the room. He appears to have all of the fancy gadgets men love, a state of the art DVD player, and IPod docking station, his guitar and surround sound. I smile to myself noting all of his remotes neatly lined up along the coffee table in front of his couch.

I continue onto the kitchen. It's clean, only remnants of his morning cereal bowl and coffee cup in the sink. Just one bowl and one cup I note pleased; there is no lipstick smudged coffee cup to accompany his. He has a large bar-like kitchen table that sits fairly high and can seat up to eight people.

I look out his back door and am greeted with a beautiful view of a large and spacious backyard. He has a barbeque set up and some chairs and a patio table with an umbrella on it.

I'm so proud as I look around Ray's home. I can't believe he actually owns a home and it's so fantastically gorgeous. He had mentioned recently moving but I had been so dense I thought he'd just meant to another apartment.

I start to take my bags upstairs to look for the spare room. I notice there are three apparent bedrooms. One is furnished, one is completely empty and the door to the last is closed. I assume that is his room and allow my mind to hope that I will be seeing it later on tonight perhaps when he returns home.

I smile and put my things onto the bed in the furnished spare room. I hum happily as I set out an outfit for the evening and head into the washroom to freshen up, shower and prepare for Ray's return.

* * *

"Hey Neela, I'm home!" Ray exclaims as he enters the front door.

"I'm in the kitchen" I call out to him.

It reminds me of the days we use to room together. Ray always felt the need to announce his arrival or departure from our apartment. I like that he did that, it made me feel important, like he wanted me to know he was home so we could chat, watch some TV, or eat some dinner together.

A tiny smile curls the corners of his mouth upwards as soon as he lays eyes on me. I had been enjoying the sunset admiring the pink and purple swirls of colour in the sky from his back door. The screen door is open and the fresh air is refreshing and cool as the day turns to night.

"Wow..." he scans the room approvingly. I had picked up some candles and a fresh bouquet of flowers and set the kitchen table with our take out dinner.

"Great minds think alike" He grins as he passes me a bouquet of freshly cut pink lilies and daisies.

"Thank you" I smile at him and am suddenly shy as I avert my eyes and focus back out to the sunset.

"It's a great view isn't it, did you give yourself a tour of the place? What'd you think?" he says as he moves closer to me and stands behind me resting his hands over my shoulders as he gently squeezes them.

"Yes, it's lovely. Your home is absolutely lovely Ray" I say breathlessly.

"You look great" he says into my ear as he runs his hands down the back of my summer dress but his touch is gone before I know it as I turn to notice him heading to the kitchen sink to wash his hands.

"Now, I know you're probably starved. But I'm feeling kind of shabby next to you, I need to grab a quick shower if that's okay with you?" he's wiping his hands with a dishcloth and looking at me with that look he gives that makes my heart melt.

How can anyone ever say no to his man, how was I able to resist his charm and deny my true feelings for so long?

"Oh yes, of course" I smile back at him "Take your time" I say as I stare at him, his eyes are glowing in the candlelight.

"Okay, I'll be quick, promise" he says as he scurries out of the room.

I pour myself another glass of wine. This is my second glass of the night I figure I can use all of the liquid courage I can garner tonight. I turn my attention back to the sunset and take in its final moments as I wait for Ray to come down for dinner. I reheat some of the food while I wait and place the flowers Ray brought home in a vase. I also wander into the den and surprise myself by figuring out Ray's complicated stereo set up. I find a nice soft melancholy melody on a radio station and leave it on quietly in the background as I return to the kitchen and take a seat at the set table. I hear Ray coming down the stairs.

"Hey, sorry about that" he says as he emerges in the doorway.

He's wearing dark jeans and a simple collared golf shirt and he smells like clean linen, fresh and oh so huggable. He takes a seat at the table and opts to sit next to me instead of across from me.

"Hey" he murmurs at me with a sly grin.

"Hey yourself" I smile back. We're quiet for a moment as we serve ourselves some food and he pours himself a glass of wine. Ray raises his glass and I pick mine up to click it against his as he says "To pleasant surprises".

We dig into the meal and start a casual conversation. "I hope I'm not intruding on any plans you may have had" I start apologetically.

"Who me? nah." he answers quietly as he eats.

"I know I probably should've told you I was coming but I wanted it to be a surprise" I continue,

"and that it was" he adds as he places a hand on my knee and rubs it for just a second before removing it and continuing to eat.

"No, but really I should've asked you... I mean told you I was coming...I do have a hotel booked in town, I don't have to stay here, would hate to impose" I fumble for words.

"Nonsense, Neela stop it." he states matter of factly.

"But, I mean...I dunno how to say this..." I continue to make an ass out of myself.

"What? Just say it ... or should I say just ask?" Ray prompts me, curious as to what I will have to say.

"Umm..." I bite my lip and turn to face him.

"Is there someone else in the picture, because I'd hate for them to get the wrong idea here" I finally blurt it out.

Ray coughs as he chokes on the sip of wine he'd been taking,

"Are you asking if I have a girlfriend Neela?" he states now having recovered from my question. He raises an eyebrow and looks at me from the side without turning his head.

"Yes. I guess that's what I'm trying to do in a not so obvious way, but failing at that of course" I joke grinning and looking down at my lap as I kick myself.

Ray clears his throat, "the answer to that question is no." he says coolly and just like that he continues to eat and sip thoughtfully on his wine. We sit in silence for a moment, but it feels like an eternity.

"I'm sorry, it's really none of my business" I offer weakly in between bites.

"Ah, of course it is, intriguing minds want to know right?' he jokes back.

"How about you, whatever happened to that Simon guy?" he asks almost sarcastically.

"Oh, well you'll be pleased to hear that in that department you were right... he was kind of an ass" I laugh as I repeat Ray's words.

"Hmm, as a former asshole I have a keen sense when it comes to picking up present assholes" he laughs and grins at me.

"So, you never answered my question earlier today" he starts,

"What's that." I ask,

"How long are you in town for? A day, a few, a week... longer?" he seems hopeful as he sets out the possibilities.

"Umm, longer I guess. I'm not really too sure right now. It kinda depends on a bunch of stuff" I answer vaguely.

"Stuff? What kinda stuff?" he asks confused.

"Well, you for one..." I trail off, we are finished eating now and Ray is up and clearing the table. He looks quizzically at me.

"Me?" he seems concerned as he tosses our dishes in the sink and heads back to the table and begins topping off our wine glasses. He takes my hand and pulls me up from the table. We move our conversation into the den as he repeats

"Me? I don't understand Neela" as we take a seat on his comfortable couch.

"Well..." I begin only to be interrupted by the sound of his front doorbell.

_Bollocks_.

_What is it with us and timely interruptions?_

I ask myself as Ray apologizes for the interruption and excuses himself to answer the front door.


	4. Chapter 4

_Okay, you guys made me feel really bad for leaving you hanging so here's a bit more. I've got to get to bed, back to work and the grind tomorrow. I can say that the next chapter will probably have an "M" rating... he he he :)_

* * *

I try to make out the muffled voices at the front door from my position on the couch. I can hear the distinct low voice of Ray and what sounds like a female voice talking for a few minutes and then I hear nothing as footsteps come closer down the hall and suddenly Ray reappears in the den with his mother in tow.

She places a dish she's holding onto the coffee table and faces me with open arms and a huge smile on her face.

"Neela! It's so wonderful to see you again" Jacy pulls me into a warm embrace and pats me on the back as I stand up from my seated position and walk over to her.

"Yes, I'm glad to be here... it's so beautiful down here" I say while returning the smile.

_Is it just me or is she studying me?_

She continues to grin at me for a moment and suddenly a cough from Ray snaps her out of her reverie.

"Oh my, how rude of me to interrupt... I should have known better when I saw a car on the driveway but I made an extra dish of lasagne tonight I just wanted to drop it off for Ray" Jacy says as she picks up the container she had set down on the coffee table.

She holds it up to me for emphasis; she hasn't stopped smiling since she laid eyes on me.

"So, Neela how are you? What brings you down? Isn't it great what Ray's done with his place? houses are so much more affordable down here, his stepfather and I helped him with the down payment" Jacy begins to blabber on, she seems excited to see me for whatever reason and also seems to have an endless amount of questions for me to answer.

"Mom" Ray interjects sternly,

"Neela and I haven't even had a chance to catch up yet. I just got back from work and she just got in... Maybe we can come over to your place for dinner or something before she heads back to Chicago?" he states in a vain attempt to get rid of his mother.

"I'm sorry dear. I didn't realize you had just arrived. Alright I'll leave you two be. I'm just going to pop this in the fridge dear and I'll see myself out. Nice seeing you sweetie." She pats me on the arm and shoots Ray a knowing glance as she leaves the room.

"Thanks mom, good night" Ray calls to her retreating figure.

Ray and I wait in silence as we hear her make her way to the kitchen and the sound of the fridge closing followed shortly thereafter by the sound of the front door closing.

I giggle as I turn to Ray who is sitting on the couch again leaning his head back on it and covering his eyes.

"Well that was totally embarrassing... I can cook you know" he states his hands still over his eyes.

I sit down next to him and pry his hands off his face and smile

"I know that. Your mother is so sweet, such a nice lady" I say looking him in the eyes.

"Oh yah, she's a sweetheart. Nothing like having your mom show up when you've got a girl over" Ray retorts sarcastically and we both laugh out loud.

"Now, where were we before we were so rudely interrupted?" Ray jokes softly as he runs his fingers down my arm.

"Mmm... I dunno were we getting ready for a game of guitar hero or something?" I joke.

"No, I don't think so" Ray whispers as he moves his face closer to mine while smirking at my humour.

"Oh... umm were we about to do the dishes, well you do the dishes while I watch?" I offer again trying to cut the tension.

"Neela..." he's breathless now and our faces are just mere inches apart. We stare into each other's eyes. I tilt my head and bring my lips to his. The kiss is soft at first and we both keep breaking apart to stare at each other like we need a physical reminder that this moment is finally happening that we are both really here and in the moment, this wonderful magical moment.


	5. Chapter 5

_**This chapter is rated "M"** for a bit of smut at the beginning. Sorry I couldn't resist :P ... You guys are the bestest with the wonderful reviews, please keep em' coming. Sorry if I'm frustrating anyone, but I can't make this simple cause then it just wouldn't be the Ray/Neela we've grown to love so much. I have to throw in a little bit of angst, but no worries, soon all will be ok! :)_

* * *

The kiss quickly grows more passionate and Ray pulls me onto his lap and removes the shawl I had been wearing over my dress. He runs his hands through my hair and it falls over my shoulders and tickles his face as I hover over him. He brings me back down towards him and kisses me with all of his might.

His kisses are perfection.

His lips are so soft and his taste intoxicating.

He sucks on my bottle lip and I moan impatiently and I feel him smiling into my lips. I run my tongue along the bottom of his lower lip and now he reciprocates the moan. I can feel his excitement growing under me through my thin dress and he's aware of this as he stops kissing me for a moment when I begin to gently rock myself into his lap. He groans and pushes me down onto the couch and he falls on top of me. He nibbles on my ear lobe, kisses down my neck to my chest. He apprehensively puts his hand over my breast and looks up at me as though to get my permission to continue. I smile down at him and that's enough for him to resume his actions. He kisses my breasts over my dress and continues to move down my body.

He slowly trails kisses down my stomach and as he gets lower I tense in anticipation of feeling his lips on my skin. I feel his hands on either side of my thighs as he raises my dress and pushes the fabric upwards as he continues to kiss me. I feel so giddy and warm inside, I'm moving about fidgety and overwhelmed by what my senses are doing to me as he touches me so skilfully. I feel him slip a finger under the top of my underwear and run it along its length as I moan his name and beg him not to stop. I spread my legs wider to give him more access and he looks up at me from between my legs with a smirk, teasing me as though he might stop.

"Ray.... please" I beg, I think he likes to hear me calling out for him, needing him so badly.

He blows softly warm air on my inner thighs and I moan louder, my urge growing immensely. He moves my underwear to the side and I finally feel the wetness of his tongue masterfully moving on me. He traces small circles on my center with his tongue. He continues for a while as I reach my climax. I'm shaking and shivering until I release myself with a final cry for him.

As my breathing stabilizes he slowly lowers my dress and moves himself back up my body as he kisses me gently. My lips are swollen from the passion between us and he nips and sucks gently on them. I feel like my body is on fire.

"Oh my..." I murmur as I sit up for a break and needing to come up for some air. I feel like I'm about to explode.

He moves off of me and reaches for our wine glasses. He passes me mine as he sips from his while holding eye contact with me. I take a big drink from my glass as now I am completely parched.

I take a moment just to look at him.

Now he has leaned back into the couch and is enjoying the music we have playing in the background. He seems to be deep in thought. I put my wine glass back down and I snuggle up to him as I kiss his ear lobe and nuzzle his neck I run my hand up his chest. I want to return the favour, want him to know I'm here for him too. I run my hand down his thigh but he stops my hand just as I reach the top of his knee by placing his hand over mine.

"Neela..." he pleads without looking at me and he does not have to say another word.

I understand we can proceed at whatever pace he sets in terms of moving around his prosthetics. To me they are a part of Ray now and I love every single part of him but I'm not too sure he's aware of it or comfortable with that just yet. I remove my hand from his knee and wrap it around his waist and I move closer to him. My other hand is above him over the back of the couch and I'm sitting facing him as he sits on the couch facing forward.

I notice a change in his demeanour suddenly.

"What is it?" I ask concerned.

"Nothing I just... It's hard for me to let you see that part of me" he whispers looking down at his lap.

"Ray, none of that matters to me. You're still the same person..." I start as he cuts me off,

"Am I Neela? Do you really think that?" he asks quietly.

"Yes, in here you are and that's all that matters to me" I say as I place a hand over his heart.

Again he seems lost in thought and suddenly he wiggles out of my arms and stands up, he walks away from the couch and stops in front of the coffee table and turns to look at me.

"Neela... I'm sorry. I thought I could do this. Now I'm not too sure" he says sadly looking down at me.

"Ray..." I start but he continues,

"I haven't been with anyone this intimately since my accident" he's blushing now, a sight I have rarely seen in the time I have known him.

"Ray, none of that matters to me. I'm here. I'm not going to let you push me away, I'm not leaving" I state boldly.

"I don't want you to leave... it's just... dammit" he exclaims frustrated as he runs a hand over his head and frowns.

"I'm sorry Neela, I'm sorry" it's all he says as he quickly turns and leaves the room.

Shortly after his exit I hear the front door closing. I sit there in shock for a second that we could have gone from a moment of such passion and love to the emptiness I was suddenly feeling inside.

Since when does Ray Barnett run away from a situation? Maybe I had overwhelmed him too quickly, too much of a surprise, suddenly I'm here and we're all over each other. I haven't even told him yet that I've moved to Louisiana, that tomorrow I have my orientation meeting with the surgical department at the same hospital he currently works at.

I'm trying to show him that I'm here finally for the two of us, to make this work out. How do I make him understand that? Perhaps it was foolish of me to jump into the physical aspect of our relationship so quickly when we have so much to sort out emotionally but I turned to Jell-O the moment he laid his hands on me and kissed me I just couldn't turn back.

A shiver runs up my back and suddenly I feel so alone, missing the warmth of his body next to mine. I didn't hear Ray grab his keys or his car pulling out of the drive so I can only assume he is either taking a walk or sitting out on the front porch. I decide to give him some time alone and a bit of space.

I head into the kitchen and make us some tea. After steeping the tea and preparing it just the way he likes it I decide to venture out front and see him. As I step out onto the front porch I see him sitting on the wicker bench in the far corner of the spacious porch.

He is staring upwards taking in the view of the stars mottled beautifully in the night sky. I walk over and pass him a cup of tea which he accepts silently. I sit down next to him and don't say anything. I just want him to know I'm there and he's not going to scare me away so easily. My breath is taken away at the beauty of the stars and the fact that I can even see so many is quite a change from the Chicago skyline I am use to. We sit in a comfortable silence that lasts a few minutes before he clears his throat.

"When I first moved back home, I would wheel my chair out of my mother's place every night and stare at the sky for hours. I would see shooting stars almost every night, so beautiful. There was always a small part of me that wondered if you were out there somewhere, looking out into the same night sky... thinking about me" He says just above a whisper.

"I would think of you all the time... when I wouldn't wake up to the smell of fresh coffee before a shift, when I would take coffee breaks at Jumbo Mart or the roach coach during a shift, when I'd take a shower and actually have hot water left... you were never far from my thoughts" I say quietly as I smile and look at him.

He's still looking straight ahead but at least he cracks a smile at my last poke about the hot water in the shower. When we were roommates he routinely used up all of our hot water and cold showers were the norm for me.

"You know right up until the end I would sometimes head down to the ER for a surgical consult and expect to see you there... it was so strange I can't explain it." I add.

"What do you mean, right up until the end?" he asks confused.

Now he has turned to look at me and I'm suddenly aware of my slip of words.

"Err... well you know, I am done my surgical residency now" I mumble.

"Yes. So what's next for you? Duke I assume? You're not gonna stay at County and let them always think of you as little Neela right?" he asks genuinely interested in my answer.

"No, no more County" I respond definitively.

"Ray, I'm sorry if things got a little too intense too quickly just now. I don't want to rush anything with you. I would never want you to feel uncomfortable... I just got caught up in the heat of the moment, we've wasted so much time it seems" I say in a very small voice.

"You're right, we have. No, I'm sorry I freaked out like that. My feelings for you are the same as they've always been Neela and I think you know what they are. I just need to take things at my own pace if that's okay?" he asks looking at me like a lost little boy.

"Of course. Ray I understand" I want to reach out and touch him but I decide to let him make the first move this time.

Maybe he will finally realize just how committed I am to us when I tell what I've done, that I've left my job at County and moved here to be with him.

Now is the time to tell him.

"Ray, there's something I have to tell you..." I begin as he responds, "Yes?"


	6. Chapter 6

**_As always, I do not own ER or any of it's characters. Please don't hurt me. Thank you all for the fantastic reviews! I look forward to hearing more from you... I think I will continue this... enjoy!_**

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"Ray, there's something I have to tell you..." I begin as he responds,

"Yes?"

I have his full attention now as he turns his body and face to look at me. He's open mouth breathing; waiting intensely focused on what it is I have to say. The look of some combination of fear, hope and confusion are displayed on his face.

"I know it may seem like we've been down this road before but I need you to let me say my piece here... please don't interrupt. I have to get this off of my chest" I start hesitantly.

There is so much to say, so much has happened between us it's hard to even think of where to begin.

"Okay" he whispers after he takes a deep breath still looking at me. Under the scrutiny of his gaze I shift uncomfortably and stand up and walk to the edge of the porch. I place my hands on the painted white rail in front of me and stare out at the street for a moment with my back facing him before I begin to speak.

"Ray, I'm so sorry for everything that transpired between us in Chicago... I was a terrible friend..." I start as tears pool in my eyes.

"Neela... please." Ray starts but soon stops himself as I turn around to face him and hold up a single hand up in protest to ask for his silence as I continue.

"I have been running from the truth for so long... denying what was right in front of me, what everyone else saw... all because of an irrational fear... a fear of what exactly I'm not sure" I continue.

He's looking back at me with a concerned look; the wheels are turning in his mind as he relives the complicity of our turbulent past.

"I know you don't blame me for what happened to you but there will always be a part of myself that I blame for contributing to the factors that led you to drink and be in the middle of the street that night... If only I'd been clearer or more decisive..." I say as a few tears start to escape my eyes.

He stands up and walks up to me and faces me in the moonlight. He raises a hand to my cheek and wipes away the tears. He leans in and kisses my cheek, runs a hand through my hair. He takes hold of one of my hands and holds it gently. He follows my rule and does not say anything; he's looking at me again with those intense green eyes.

_Staring._

We stare at each other for a long moment and I frown as my mind scurries over all of the things I want to say.

"I'm listening..." he prompts me to continue.

"I was married Ray. I was married and I was falling in love with you. My husband was off fighting in a war to protect our freedom and all I could think about was what it would be like to be with my best friend... I felt like the worst wife ever... and then... then Michael died."

I'm sobbing now and he's released my hand as I raise it to my face to wipe some of the tears away as my body shakes I turn away from him and lean into the porch rail for support. He wraps an arm around me and squeezes my shoulder and waits for me to continue this verbal purge of my innermost thoughts and confessions. The things I have never been able to say out loud to anyone let alone him, until now.

"I thought I was being punished for my adulterous thoughts when I got the news of Michael's passing, that's why I pushed you even further away. I had heard the rumours, people thought we were sleeping together Ray... and I was married, and suddenly Michael was gone... I just couldn't even bring myself to look at you without being plagued by an all encompassing guilt... it felt so right in my heart but I allowed what other people might have said to govern my thoughts and my actions and so I pushed you away... and for that I'm sorry. I'm sorry you had to see me with Tony that was utterly ridiculous..." I ramble on.

"That was a very difficult time..." he says quietly introspectively looking down at the ground.

"After your accident and then my own accident I had a lot of time to think, I wanted to be a part of your life again but I wasn't sure you even wanted me around at that time... After I had recovered from my injuries I threw myself into surgery that was all I had... the hospital... I would get up and go to work everyday, I practically lived there... that was all there was to my existence, work." I take a deep breath and exhale before I continue

"As I excelled in my career, my life was slowly falling apart at the seams... and then you wrote me a letter and we began to communicate again... suddenly I was hopeful again... hopeful of the future... You and I, we repaired a relationship I thought was unsalvageable... I had conceded to the fact that I'd lost you forever... and then you came to visit last Halloween" I turned to smile at him, it's a weak smile but he seems grateful to see it.

"I was amazed to see how well you had recovered, and you had done it all on your own, I was so proud. As I watched you drive away that night I was so upset at myself for once again failing to take a chance, you were right there in front of me and again I had failed to tell you how I felt... once again I let my fear of the unknown hold me back"

"Seeing you that night, it stirred up feelings that I had locked away deep inside of me... feelings I thought I'd never get to act on... but still I sat on it... I didn't do anything except miss you like hell which is what brought me to this point" I say as I look up at him.

"This point?" he asks quietly.

"A breaking point of sorts, for once in my life I decided to take a chance and I bought a one way ticket to Louisiana" I say meekly as I look down at my feet.

"One way?" Ray says it hoarsely just above a whisper as though he cannot believe the words that have come out of my mouth.

"I'm not going to Duke Ray" I say as I smile at him.

"I've taken an attending position at Lechatlier... I'm going to be the Assistant Professor of Surgery" I say it quietly as I await his response.

He's quiet for a moment as though the information is setting in and suddenly I feel his strong arms around me. _Finally_. He is embracing me tightly and he picks me up and we rock back and forth on his front porch.

"Am I allowed to speak yet?" he asks jokingly.

"Yes, I think I'm done now" I poke him in the stomach playfully as he puts me down and looks at me.

"How did you pull this off? I had no idea" he asks happily.

"Well, I wanted to show you how I felt, wanted you to know that I was finally ready if you would still have me after all this time. I had been corresponding with a few hospitals and yours was at the top of my list... only because I hear the Physical Med. And Rehab doctors are really cute...well, this one in particular" I kid smiling up at him.

"Shut up, I'm still reeling here!" he exclaims as he cups my face in his hands and kisses me softly on the lips.

"Anyway, I contacted Lechatlier by e-mail and then by phone, had a few chats with the head of the surgical department and before I knew it I had a position... I declined my offers from Duke and County, rented out my apartment, packed up all of my things, sat in the airport for hours with a rain delay, sat on the tarmac for another hour before takeoff due to more delays and now I'm finally here. I must admit after seeing the look on your face when you saw me walk into the physiotherapy room it has all been worth it." I smile up at him as he strokes my hair and kisses me gently over and over again on my lips.

"Ray..." I begin again,

"Woman, you still have more to say? Of course you do..." he smiles as he rolls his eyes and looks at me.

"Just one more thing... I love you." I say and with that he finally allows the tears that had been forming in his eyes to trickle slowly down his face.

"I've loved you since the day I left you standing on the sidewalk with your t-shirt in your hands... I'm sorry it took me so long to finally come around" I offer a useless apology after all of these years.

"Neela, none of the past matters anymore from here on in, it's all about our future. I love you too" he whispers as he catches his breath and strokes the side of my face and holds me close.


	7. Chapter 7

_Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews, I love you guys!!! _

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We stand there in cool light of the moon under the stars holding each other and he whispers "Thank You" into my ear.

His words make the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and a shiver courses over my body.

"You cold?" he asks concerned as he hold me tighter.

"Perhaps a little... why are you thanking me?" I ask wanting to know exactly what he's thanking me for.

"For finally saying all of the things I've been waiting to hear you say for so long, for coming to me... moving here and leaving County... I know how hard that must have been for you" he speaks softly into my hair as he rests his chin on my head.

"Wanna head back in? I'm not tired really, are you?" he asks me as he rubs my back obviously worried still that I'm cold.

"Sure. I'm not tired either, are you working tomorrow?" I ask worried that I'm keeping him up.

"No, I actually had my appointments moved around so I could have the next two days off after you came by the hospital today... thought we could do some sightseeing and stuff" he says as he smiles down at me.

"Hmm little did you know we'd have plenty of time for that..." I smile back up at him as he takes my hand and we head inside the house.

We head back into the den and I get comfortable on the couch after kicking off my sandals as I pull the blanket lying down over the top of it onto myself and snuggle into it.

"Do you want more tea? wine? beer?" he asks before he sits down.

"I could do with a beer as long as you're having one" I say casually.

"Okay, beer it is" he disappears for a moment and is back before I know it with two cool beers in his hands. He passes me one as he sits down next to me. He gets under the blanket I've wrapped myself in and I stretch my legs out over his to get more comfortable. He places his hands over my thighs and rubs them lovingly. There is no longer any tension in the air; I feel a great release between us now that everything is out in the open.

We sit in our comfortable silence for a few minutes, listening to the music that's playing on the radio and sipping on our beers.

"So... now that I've said everything that I needed to say... I have a few questions for you" I cut into the moment as I'm feeling brave.

"Really? Like what?" he asks intrigued.

"Well, I don't get it...you could have had anyone you fancied back then or even now, why me?" I ask a question I've often asked myself when it comes to Ray and me. At the time we began to have feelings for each other we seemed quite a mismatched pair.

"Well, at first I was very confused. I thought maybe I was mixing up my feelings for you as a friend for something else... I had never had such a close friendship with a woman before and we were not only living together but working together..." he starts as he licks his lips and purses his lips while he speaks to me.

"And I mean look at you, you're gorgeous... have you looked in a mirror lately" he continues.

"Stop" I plead modestly as I feel a blush creeping across my cheeks.

"Not only are you beautiful, but we clicked in so many ways... I felt like we were benefiting from all of the perks of a relationship without really having one... know what I mean?" he asks looking at me.

"We were always together, worked together, ate together, shopped together... the only thing we didn't do was sleep together" I jump in.

"Yeah, not according to our co-workers at County though!" he exclaims as he laughs at the rumour mill in the ER.

I giggle as I ask "had you heard that before I said it tonight?'

"Yes, actually I got it from Morris and Frank one day at admit... I was floored when they said it!" he laughs as he continues to drink his beer.

"I mean really, did they think we were that daft to be doing something like that while I was married?" I ask incredulously as I break into a giggle.

"I guess they saw something before we did" he whispers quietly and thoughtfully.

"I suppose... or they took our friendship out of context" I offer up an explanation.

"I think we did that as well" he kids laughing at me.

"True." I respond quietly.

"So, is that all you wanted to know from my end... why you?" He asks waiting for more.

"Umm, pretty much. I just never took myself to be your type" I shrug as I look at him.

"What, beautiful, successful, talented, great personality... what could I possibly want in you right?" He jokes as he tickles me.

I giggle and start to squirm and the blush returns to my face

"Okay, I get it I get it enough." I plead as he stops the tickling.

He's suddenly serious again as he speaks

"Everything happens for a reason Neela. I guess we needed to go through all of that crap to get to where we are, we're finally here... together" he leans in to kiss me softly.

"Yes finally." I say definitively as I smile at him, I reach out and cradle the side of his face as he leans into my touch and turns to kiss the palm of my hand.

"So, when do you start at the hospital?" he asks with a huge grin on his face.

"Actually I have my orientation tomorrow at ten, but I don't officially start for another week. I guess they want to give me time to settle into my office and become acquainted with the surgical department and stuff like that" I say smiling back at him.

"Office? You get an office... I'm kidding, of course you do... I can give you a tour of the hospital if you want when you're done tomorrow?" he says proudly as he squeezes my leg,

"No, there will plenty of time for that, you've got the day off. I want you to think of something fun for us to do when I get back from the orientation" I say smiling at him.

"Oh... I can think of a few things" he says flirtatiously as he leans into to kiss me passionately.

We break apart after a few minutes before things get too heated.

_There will be plenty of time for that as well. _

I remind myself as he speaks to me again.

"So where had you planned to stay? You weren't serious about living out of a hotel were you?' he asks picking up the conversation again.

"Yes, I was dead serious, what's so bad about that?" I look at him feigning hurt.

"Well it's ridiculous number one and number two you will be staying here with me... it'll be like old times again... now I'll have someone to split the mortgage payments with" he jokes with me.

"Ha ha. Very funny. I uh... I can stay in the spare room if you're serious about this offer to live together" I say worried that us sharing a room would mean us moving too fast for him.

"Uhh we can always work out the logistics later... but I do want you to stay here, I won't take no for an answer" he says awkwardly skirting the issue of us sharing a room.

"Okay, then it's settled, I will be living here with you, together." I say as I lay back on the sofa.

"You sure you're not tired after your long day and all of the travelling and all?" he asks as he begins to rub my feet.

It feels like heaven, his touch and this moment between us. Nothing special is going on just us chatting like old times, perhaps with a bit more touching and kissing which makes it all so much better.

I smile back lazily at him lost in his touch "Mmm" I murmur as I relax into his massage and see him smirk and smile at me as he continues to rub my feet.

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_There will be more... working my way up to that love scene... let me know if I'm boring you guys with the day to day with them but I like thinking about the little things that we never got to see on the show... like them hanging out, having a night in like this._


	8. Chapter 8

_Hey everyone! I'm having major ER withdrawal, I still can't believe it's over!!! I keep thinking it's gonna be on Thursday :(_

_Anyways, thought I'd switch things up a bit and move onto Ray's POV for a few chapters, I think Neela's narrative up til now has pretty much made it clear where's she's coming from and what she wants from Ray. Now that's she's finally professed her love to him I think it's only fair we get a glimpse of what might be going on in that gorgeous head of his.  
_

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"You sure you're not tired after your long day and all of the travelling and all?" he asks as he begins to rub my feet. It feels like heaven, his touch and this moment between us. Nothing special is going on just us chatting like old times, perhaps with a bit more touching and kissing which makes it all so much better. I smile back lazily at him lost in his touch "Mmm" I murmur as I relax into his massage and see him smirk and smile at me as he continues to rub my feet.

**_Ray's POV_**

I can't help but stare at her as she stretches out and moans at my touch while I rub her feet. She must be tired. I'm sure her day was full of emotion as she bid goodbye to Lucien her mentor and walked out of the doors of County for the last time.

She's fighting sleep right now, no doubt trying to stay awake and in this moment with me. I watch her eyelids flutter as she tries to keep talking to me but her words have become incoherent and she's mumbling apparently appreciating my touch as I continue to give her a foot massage. I catch myself watching her as she nods off into her well deserved sleep.

I smile to myself; this moment feels so surreal I feel as though I should pinch myself.

_I am in Baton Rouge, in my home with Neela who's moved here, her legs sprawled over my lap sleeping._

I lean my head back on the couch and smirk to myself as now I begin to rub her ankles and calves, I can tell she approves as she begins to moan and murmur again in her sleep. Some time passes and her breathing becomes deeper and I note she has definitely drifted off into a peaceful slumber. I take the opportunity to watch her sleep. It's been so long since I've had this privilege.

I use to watch her sleep sometimes when we were roommates.

Back then she would often fall asleep as we watched a scary movie on the couch or nod off after a long shift and a filling dinner.

Back then I would watch her as her chest rose and fell with each peaceful breath she took and dream that someday I would get to touch her and hold her as she slept. And now that moment had come. Here we were together, finally.

I stop massaging her and reach for the television remote while trying not to disturb her. I put on Leno and begin to watch his opening monologue while I sneak sideways glances at her sleeping figure. It's amazing how so much time has passed but this small sleeping form on the couch beside me still has the same effect on me.

She makes me feel so big and so small at the same time, so important yet so goofy as well. I feel my stomach rise to my throat and I am dizzy with glee every time I lay my eyes on her. I just feel like I'm at home whenever I'm with her. To me she is home, here or in Chicago home is wherever Neela is and finally she is here. A tiny part of me still can't believe she is here, that she came to me and confessed her love.

I run my hands over the skin of her legs exposed on my lap beneath her sundress. Her skin is warm and smooth like velvet. She's sleeping with the faintest hint of a smile on her face and she seems at peace. I can only imagine what a huge decision it was for her to make to come out here and leave everything for me. She made this choice all on her own and I truly appreciate that. I admire her strength she always knows how to get what she wants, even if it takes her four years to realize and acknowledge what exactly that is.

I finish off my beer and feel my own eyelids getting heavy as I continue to watch the late night show on TV. I lean my head back on the couch and manage to prop my prosthetics onto the coffee table in front of me without disturbing her. I close my eyes and allow myself to peacefully drift off into the best sleep I've had in years.

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_As always, your reviews are appreciated as I love to hear your input and ideas. Thanks for all of the suggestions, I will definitely try to incorporate them into the story. Sorry this chapter is so short, next will definitely be longer._


	9. Chapter 9

_Sorry for the delay with this chapter. Thank you for the great reviews :) _

_This chapter is still Ray's POV  
_

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I awoke to the sound of a thud followed by a very British sounding "Crap!"

As I opened my eyes and adjusted to the blue light the television set was casting around the room I noticed Neela was on the floor in front of the couch below me.

"Neela?!? What happened?" I say first shocked to see her in that position but soon I begin to chuckle as I realized what has happened.

"I dunno, I guess I fell asleep... and I rolled off the couch!" she exclaims as she props her head onto the couch cushion above her to look up at me as she holds an arm out for me to lift her back up onto the couch.

"Ouch" she says as she sits next to me and pats at a spot on her forehead.

"I think I bumped my head on the table... ouch" she says again as she touches the spot once more.

"Oh no, here lemme see" I say concerned as I pull her towards me and examine the spot on her head.

"It's not bleeding, but it is tender... I'm gonna get some ice for that" I say as I get up and head to the kitchen. I find a bag of frozen peas in the freezer and head back into the den and sit back down next to her as I place it on her forehead.

"Sorry, it's the best I could find... it'll do" I say as she winces when I apply pressure to the spot. We sit there for a moment as the light from the TV dances around us and she asks "What time is it? I can't believe I just nodded off like that..."

"It's a bit past four" I answer after glancing at my watch.

"Bollocks. I hope I don't have a huge bump on my head for my first day tomorrow" she worries.

"You won't" I offer reassuringly as I continue to ice the spot. I remove the frozen peas for a moment to peak at the spot, it looks okay no swelling. I kiss her on the cool spot on her forehead.

"Looks okay, wanna ice it a bit longer?" I ask her as she smiles at me.

"I think I'll be okay, I should get to bed... I have to be up by eight thirty or so to get ready in the morning" she says as she stands up from the couch.

"Alright, let's head to bed then. Are you sure you don't want me to come tomorrow? I think I should." I say wanting her to know how much I appreciate this transition she's willing to make for me. I want it to go as smoothly as possible.

"No, I'll be fine Ray." She smiles at my concern and cradles the side of my face with her hand and kisses the top of my head. She takes the bag of frozen peas from me and disappears into the kitchen to put them away. I stand up from my position on the couch and turn off the television and wait for her in the hallway.

As she reappears from the kitchen I pull her into an embrace for a moment before we head upstairs to bed. As she starts to walk up the stairs in front of me I stay close to her and sling one of my arms across her chest from behind as I follow her up. She raises her hand to hold my arm and our other two hands are entwined together at our sides. I kiss the top of her head when we reach the top of the stairs I keep walking and she stops just outside of the spare room she has placed her suitcases in.

I try to push her on towards my bedroom but she resists and holds her ground.

"My room is over there" I whisper in her ear as I try to pull her towards it.

"I know, err Ray I think I should just stay in the spare bedroom tonight... all of my stuff is already in here, and it's late..." she says as she lets go of me and turns to face me.

_Great._

Obviously my hesitation and slight meltdown earlier this evening has set us back a bit as I notice her reluctance to sleep in the same bedroom as me.

"Neela... I just wanna hold you and sleep tonight... I promise to keep my hands to myself" I say as I throw the last little bit in as an attempt to lighten the moment.

"There's always tomorrow..." she says looking down. She seems disappointed.

_Way to go asshole._

I tell myself as I see the slightest glimpse of a frown cross her face.

"And I don't want to disturb you when my alarm goes off in the morning, you should lie in and enjoy your day off" she adds in attempt to convince me why we should spend the night in separate rooms after all of this time apart.

I feel like this is all my fault, she's taken the intensity back a notch and it's all because of the way I acted earlier this evening when she touched me. I'm frustrated in this moment as we stand here in my hallway looking at each other. Words are not going to work here, I have to show her.

I crush my lips down onto hers and catch her a bit off guard as I kiss her with passion and intensity. I press her up against the wall and pin her between it and my body. She moans, I moan and we are a mess of tangled limbs and wandering hands. I pick her up and she wraps her legs around my waist, the kiss deepens and she's moaning my name. I turn and begin to walk us towards my room as she helplessly whispers "Ray....no".

Once inside my room I playfully toss her down onto the bed and look down at her as she stares up at me. Her lips are swollen from our kiss and her face is flushed.

"You're sleeping in here with me, I won't take no for an answer" I say firmly as I grin cheekily down at her.

"Yes Sir!" she says as she sits up on her knees and mock salutes me as she pulls me down towards her and we begin to kiss all over again. We roll around for a bit on my bed lost in each other's touch, kissing and holding each other.

"Ray..." she says breathlessly between kisses, "Ray!" she says more sternly as she finally breaks our kiss and pushes me up off of her a bit.

"I should really get some sleep... I don't want to be a mess tomorrow, I have to impress the head of surgery" she says as she gets up and grins at me from her now safe position away from and off of the bed.

"I'm just going to change and wash up for bed, I'll be right back... you should probably do the same" she says as she bites her lip and turns to leave the room.

"Mm'kay" I say reluctantly as I head into my washroom and get ready for bed. I'm tucked into bed waiting for her when she returns my prosthetics are leaning against the bedpost on my side of the bed.

"Hey" she says as she reappears in the doorway wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt that looks awfully familiar. I notice her eyes shift for a brief moment to my prosthetics and then she lays her eyes on mine and smiles at me as she climbs into the bed. We stare at each other for a moment and I lean in and kiss her softly, just a good night kiss and after we break apart she turns her back to me and lies down next to me. I take her cue and turn off the night lamp and spoon her and pull her even closer to me. I wrap my arm around her and she pulls my hand to her mouth and kisses it.

"Good night Ray" she says quietly as I smell her hair.

"Night, Neela." I say as I kiss the back of her head. She fits so perfectly in my arms. It feels so right, her smell intoxicates me as we lay there in the dark holding each other. I know she's not sleeping yet because her breathing hasn't deepened.

"Neela?" I ask,

"Yes?"

"This all feels like a dream. Like if I fall asleep I'll wake up and you'll be gone" I say just above a whisper. She turns to face me and in the dim light of the room we still manage to find each other's eyes. She looks right at me,

"I'm not going anywhere, ever. Sorry you are stuck with me" she whispers back to me.

"Good, I wouldn't want it any other way" I say as I pull her closer to me and let my hand rest over the crook of her waist.

I kiss her forehead and we both fall into a blissful sleep.

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_Please review, love to hear your thoughts! I think next chapter I will be switching back to Neela's POV, I don't think I'm doing so well as Ray, being a girl I find it a little strange trying to write from his POV._


	10. Chapter 10

_Many thanks to all for the wonderful reviews. First part of the chapter is still Ray's POV, then I switch it back to Neela's POV._

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**Ray's POV:**

"What did you forget?" I ask teasingly as I opened the front door shortly after Neela had left for her meeting at the hospital the next morning. She had just barely managed to leave on time and had cursed me, lovingly of course for insisting she sit down to enjoy the breakfast I had whipped up for her before she left.

We had slept like babies last night, holding each other close.

The first thing I did when I woke up this morning was reach out for her. No, yesterday had not been a dream Neela was actually lying next to me in my bed sleeping quite blissfully. I had set my cell phone alarm to go off about half an hour before she had set her own alarm to wake herself up.

I wanted our first morning together to be special so I put on the coffee, scrambled her some eggs and fried some bacon to make her a hearty breakfast to fuel her for her first day at the hospital. She had woken up and come down to check on me when she smelled the coffee and bacon.

I noticed her standing in the doorway of the kitchen smiling at me as I cooked. She was still wearing that familiar oversized t-shirt she had slept in her hair was dishevelled and falling softly over her shoulders and she looked absolutely gorgeous as she always did. I felt my breath hitch as she walked over to me and kissed me good morning before grabbing a cup of coffee and then heading up to shower and get ready for her hospital orientation.

We had sat down and eaten over casual conversation and she spent most of the meal glancing at her watch worrying that she would be late to the hospital. I smiled and reassured her that she would be there in plenty of good time. I had set up the GPS in her rental to take her to the hospital and I had also snuck in one of the mixed cds I had made for her into her car stereo to serenade her through her drive to the hospital.

I know it must have brought a smile to her face when she started the engine and heard a song that reminded her of us, and why she was doing all of this in the first place.

"Morning honey" my mom's voice broke into my thoughts.

"Mom, I'm sorry I thought you might be Neela" I say snapping back into the moment.

"I don't mean to come by so early but I was driving by and I noticed her car was gone so I thought I'd pop in and see how things went between the two of you last night?" she asks nosily but also as a concerned mother.

"Where is she?" she asks nervously.

She's worried, I can tell. Worried that she will have to pick up the pieces again, worried I may plunge into a deep sadness again. After my accident and the Vicodin incident I had told her everything, all about my feelings for Neela and the way we had danced around our emotions for a few years until it all ended so quickly that night in the middle of the street as I stared at my voicemail alert message from Neela.

"Ray, Honey what happened?" she rewords her question but still has the same concern in her voice as she awaits my answer.

"She's at the hospital" I answer, not thinking of how it might sound but realizing it as soon as I see the look of shock on her face.

"What!?!... oh no, what happened?" she shrieks at me as she walks into the house and turns to look at me completely appalled.

"Shit. No it's okay, she's at work I mean at the hospital... she moved here, she's going to be working at LeChatlier with me" I say through the biggest goofiest smile. I can't hide my excitement or my happiness, there is no filter needed here in this moment. No chance of me appearing a lovesick fool, this is my mom after all and I know she wants this almost as much as I do, possibly even more.

"Ohh sweetie, that's wonderful! This is such great news!!!" a smile comes to her face as her expression softens again and she rushes over to me and pulls me into a hug.

"I want to hear all about it!" she gushes as she guides me to the kitchen and I take a seat at the table. She pours herself a cup of coffee and joins me at the table. She lovingly reaches out and pats my arms as she smiles at me.

"Mom, stop. Were you really that worried about me?" I half joke but half seriously ask her.

"No. Ray all I want is for you to be happy and I know from what you've told me that Neela is the only woman that can bring you that happiness. So tell me! When did you two decide on this? How did this all come about?" she asks impatiently.

"We really didn't discuss this. Neela completely surprised me. Well, I mean I think I was pretty clear about the way I felt for her... it really was up to her and in the end she finally came to me" I say as I am smiling again actually more precisely grinning at her.

"This is wonderful! So she's not just visiting? She's here to stay?" she asks more mom-like questions.

"Yes. Neela has moved to Louisiana. She turned down her offer at County and a few other hospitals and took a surgical position at my hospital... Mom, she told me she loves me... she finally said it." I barely have the last few words out and I'm choking back tears.

I'm suddenly seeing the payout for all of the hard work I did to bring myself back to this point. All of the painful surgeries, the rehabilitation, and my new specialty at work; it was all finally paying off. Neela was here and we're finally beginning our lives together.

"I haven't seen you smile like this in a very long time... it's nice to see you so happy." my mom says as she cups my face in her hands and kisses me on the cheek.

"Well, John and I have to have you two over. Tonight, dinner at our place, seven o'clock" she says firmly.

"I dunno, mom I don't want to overwhelm her with too much too soon..." I try to wiggle my way out of it. Truth is I want her all to myself, for now at least. I know it's selfish but I'm done with sharing her, for just a few days I want her to be all mine.

"Nonsense, she's family now. I won't take no for an answer. Just enlighten us for an hour or two with your presence, I remember what it's like to be so young and in love, I promise we won't keep you long." She's staring at me now giving me one of her motherly looks.

"Okay, we'll see you at seven" I sigh as I give into her.

"Okay then, I better get to the grocery store and pick us up something to make for dinner. Is there anything that she doesn't like?" she asks concerned about impressing Neela.

"No mom, she's not picky... I'm sure she will love whatever you make. We'll bring the wine" I say reassuringly as I walk my mother to the front door.

"Okay, now don't be late. See you tonight." She pats me on the arm and kisses me on the cheek once more as she turns to leave.

My mother and I were never very close when I was growing up. But since my accident she had been a major part of my support system and she never let me down as we restored the bonds we had broken earlier during a more rebellious time in my life. I loved her dearly, and was truly touched at her excitement over welcoming Neela into our family and our lives. I just hoped Neela would be okay with all of the attention she would no doubt be receiving tonight at my mother's home. Hopefully she wouldn't be too exhausted from her first day for an evening out.

Somewhere, way in the back of my mind I'm happy for the distraction. Happy to have something else to do other than try to think of ways not to be intimate with Neela. I know she said she loved me and she would let me set the pace but I also know she wants to make love to me. I'm not sure where this sudden insecurity has come from within me. Neela's a doctor she's seen amputees before, she's also seen me at my worst, in the hospital right after the accident. I just have this completely unfounded fear of something awkward happening within the mechanics of us making love. It has been so long since I've done it, and now it will be with her. I curse myself for not working out the kinks of my new body with one of the endless number of nurses who were willing to bed me when I first started at LeChatlier, you know kind of like taking a new car out for a test drive. I had no interest in them though there was only one woman on my mind. Neela.

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**Back to Neela's POV:**

"Ray... I'm back." I call out to what appears to be an empty house.

"Ray" I repeat as I glance into the den and the dining room and then make my way into the kitchen. Suddenly the smell of food cooking hits me and I smile to myself as I spot him outside in the backyard at the grill. Music is blasting, it sounds familiar to me and soon I recognize the song as the Clash's London Calling. He's singing along with it and shaking his head back and forth using his cooking utensils as an impromptu microphone as he occasionally turns to sing into them.

I stifle a laugh as I relish in the moment watching him. It appears some things never change. I open the screen door quietly and stand in the doorway admiring him. Whatever he's cooking smells delicious. He continues singing until the song ends and then turns to notice me as he probably felt my eyes burning a hole through his back.

"Hey you... ugh how long you been standing there?" he asks seemingly embarrassed as the next track on the CD starts he quickly shuts the player off.

"Long enough... great moves by the way" I joke as I smirk at him and make my way over to him. I've missed him. I was only gone a little over three hours but God did I miss him. I wrap my arms around his waist from behind and hug him.

"How did it go?" he asks as he continues to barbeque and looks down at me.

"It was great; I think I'm really going to like it there. I have a really good feeling about it" I smile up at him as he leans down to peck me on the lips.

"Ah, so there isn't a southern version of Crenshaw in the department I take it?" he kids as he reaches down to squeeze my hands which are still encircled around him.

"Nope, not an asshole in sight. Plenty of southern charm all around" I say as I squeeze him tighter before finally releasing him.

"Well I'm glad you liked it. Hope you're hungry I'm making us some Cajun style chicken... figure you better get use to the cooking" he says as he tosses the food onto two plates and heads over to the patio table to set them down.

"Well, it smells fabulous and I am starving" I say as I pour myself a glass of lemonade he has set out for us at the table and sit down to eat. He joins me and we eat in silence for a few minutes, although he's kicking at my feet playfully under the table and smiling coyly at me every time I look up at him when he does it.

"So my mom stopped by this morning after you left" he starts without looking up at me.

"Oh really, is everything okay?" I asked concerned and not too sure why he is telling me this.

"Yah, fine. She was just wondering where you were... she worries about me sometimes." He says in between bites of food.

"I hope you don't mind but I sort of told her everything" he says now as he looks down at his plate.

"Everything?" I ask a little concerned.

"No, not everything. But you know, that you have moved down here and taken a position at the hospital" he clarifies.

"Oh." I say as I gulp down my lemonade, it's quite warm out today.

"Oh?" he asks as he looks at me for a more definitive answer.

"How did she take it all?" I ask wearily.

"Well, I'd be lying if I didn't say that she's absolutely over the moon about it all..." he says as he grins at me.

"She's aware of our plight... the story behind us. I told her everything. I felt like I had to in order to explain to her my state of mind when I first came home after you know." He speaks softly there is an air of sadness in his voice.

"I understand Ray" I say as I reach for his hand and take hold of it across the table.

"So yeah, needless to say she is happy that we appear to have finally sorted things out" he clears his throat before saying "and she wants us to go over to her place for dinner tonight".

"Tonight?...uhh" I start with a bit of hesitation in my voice,

"I know, you're probably tired and still adjusting to everything but she swore she wouldn't hold us hostage for any longer than two hours" he tries to soothe me over.

"Of course we can go there for dinner, did you think that I wouldn't want to?" I ask worried that he is still questioning my commitment even after all that I have done.

"No... Well I wasn't sure, I dunno." He says sounding a little confused.

"Err, well she wants us there by seven, and I told her we would bring the wine... Oh before I forget, I was able to get a hold of your moving company and they will re-direct your delivery to the house instead of the storage place, so all of your stuff should be arriving here tomorrow... and I called the hotel and cancelled your reservation" he changes topics but appears relieved that I took well to the idea of dinner with his mother and her husband.

"That's great. Thanks for offering to do all of that for me" I say appreciatively as I smile at him.

"That's what I'm here for" he grins at me and winks as he scoops up our empty plates and heads inside with them. I pick up our empty glasses and the lemonade flask and follow him inside as I smile to myself, happy at how easily our life together is falling into place. Hopefully the evening at his mother's place would go as smoothly as the rest of my new life here has.

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_As always, reviews are much appreciated. If anyone's wondering why I threw in that last bit at the end of Ray's POV I just wanted to make sure it was clear where he was coming from since the rest of the story will probably be in Neela's POV. I will try to update much sooner this time, sorry for the delay!_


	11. Chapter 11

_Okay, so it appears I really messed up and left out a chapter! sorry to take it back a step but this Chapter was supposed to be posted before the chapter with them actually going to dinner at Jacey's place. Whoops :S_ I guess I missed it when I was uploading!

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The rest of the day had gone very smoothly. We both decided to kick back a bit and relax. Ray had cleared up the dishes after our wonderful lunch and I changed into some more comfortable clothes. We chatted and lounged on the couch watching daytime television which was as horrible in Louisiana as it was in Chicago. It all felt somewhat odd and strange, reaching out to hold his hand while we watched television, him kissing me affectionately as he played some new music for me that he had been working on with his guitar. I kept waiting for someone or something to interrupt us, ruin these precious moments we were having and sharing with each other but nothing ever did. We were finally getting to spend time together and be open with our love for each other and the feeling was simply exhilarating.

Every time I would look into his eyes butterflies would flutter inside of me and my hair would stand on its' ends, he simply had that effect on me with his smouldering eyes. Truth be told he had always had that effect on me I was just a lot better at hiding that fact in the past. However, now there was no reason to fight it, as I studied his facial expressions his puppy dog pout, his sexy smirk, his crooked grin they all had the same effect on me. Put simply Ray made me weak in the knees, my heart beats faster at just the sound of his voice, a glance across the room or a soft touch from him. It had been so long since I had these feelings stirred within me; I was like a teenager experiencing my first love all over again. This of course was so much more than that. This was true love, the love of my lifetime, the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. This was Ray. I had nodded off on the couch, napping in my newfound bliss as the sun began to set and evening sprung upon us. Ray's couch was amazing and so comfy and soft it even had the faintest touch of his scent on its cushions. I awoke to Ray gently shaking me as he held onto one of my ankles.

"Neela, it's almost 5:30... I wasn't sure if you wanted to shower before we head over to my mom's place" he says sweetly, concerned he knows that I will want to look my best for this occasion.

I stifle a yawn "Mmm, sorry I guess I nodded off there for a bit, but yes I do. Thanks for waking me up" I sit up and kiss him on the lips.

When I try to pull back and break what I intended to be a quick peck he places his hands on the back of my head and pulls me back towards him and deepens the kiss. The passion increases quickly as we kiss fervently. He gently pushes me back down onto the couch and he lays over me as we make out like teenagers sneaking around at their parent's house. I can't help but moan into his kisses; he has a way with his hands and his lips and definitely his tongue. I'm dying to be with him but I hold back and try my best to follow his cues. The cue I'm getting from below his waist is that he's at full attention but we don't have time for this right now, this moment should not be spent hastily on the couch, I want us to be able to take our time with it. He's sucking on my neck and nibbling on my ear lobes soon and as he's trailing kisses down my neck to my chest I bite my lip and curse his timing.

"Ray... we need to stop... Ray, I have to go get ready for dinner" I try to say firmly but I'm at a loss under his touch I'm useless and my words are mumbled and whispered out amidst groans from deep within me.

"Ray... please" I beg more assertively this time and he looks up at me and shakes his head in a "No" motion playfully. Suddenly he begins to tickle me and I start to laugh madly as I wriggle out of his hold and fall onto the floor below.

"Oh shit. Sweetie, I'm sorry I didn't mean for you to fall of the couch!" he exclaims as he reaches out an arm to help me up. I take it and stand up and push him over as I pinch his arm,

"Riiight, sure you didn't you wanker" I kid as I step further away from him as he reaches for me once again.

"Oh no you don't! Hands off we have got to get ready for the dinner" I yell at him through my grin and he jumps up and chases me out of the room and up the stairs. I'm dizzy with glee when I reach the top of the staircase and I'm also out of breath as he catches up to me and places his hands around my waist and begins to kiss me all over again.

"Ray!" I say into his kiss and I pound on his chest, "you are incorrigible!" I say as I finally break free from him.

"I'm going to use the spare bathroom and the spare room to get dressed, you get your ass into your room and get dressed... no more funny business" I wince as I attempt to walk away from him and he places his hands on my waist from behind and pulls me back flush against him. My back is still turned to him and his chest is up again me as he holds me tightly.

"Okay, I guess this will just have to be continued later..." he says huskily into my ear. And suddenly, all over again there are those butterflies, and my hairs are standing on end as I attempt to find my voice,

"Promise?" I half state and half ask him as I slowly pry myself out of his hold and head to the washroom.

"You sure you don't want to shower together and preserve water?" he kids through the door as I close it.

"Ray, come on we're going to be late... I don't want to be late for our first dinner at Jacey's place" I say pleading at him from the safety of the other side of the door.

"I know, I know... this is important to you, okay... seeya in a bit" he says sounding like a defeated little kid as he makes his way to his room to get ready for our evening with his family.


	12. Chapter 12

**_*EDIT: I am such a dork! I forgot to post the chapter that was supposed to come before this one, so I've added it now. My apologies to anyone getting new chapter alerts cause this is what was previously Chapter 11... there is a new chapter posted, it's just the one that was supposed to be before this one, so go back a chapter for the new stuff... sorry!_**

_Thanks to everyone for their great reviews! I'm loving all of the wonderful Reela stories we're getting lately on here. I miss ER so much! This chapter is still back to Neela's POV.  
_

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An hour and a bit later I emerged from the spare bedroom dressed for our evening at Ray's mother's place. I noted Ray's room light was turned off so he was obviously ready and waiting downstairs for me. Earlier, his light had been turned on as I passed from the washroom to the spare room after my shower. I had heard his voice from the shower in his bedroom where he was singing quite happily at the top of his lungs. It has brought a smile to my face; it was one of the million little things I missed about him.

_His singing in the shower._

I had opted to wear a sleeveless and strapless simple black dress that fitted tightly over my chest and waist and flowered out into a looser fitting bottom that stopped just below my knees. I threw on my nicest pair of black high heels to compliment the dress and kept my look simple without any jewellery. My hair was loose and falling in soft curls just over my shoulders. When I headed down the stairs I noticed most of the lights in the house were turned off and figured out that Ray was probably waiting out on the front porch for me. As I stepped out onto the porch I saw he was looking up at the beautiful early evening sky as it faded from purple to black.

Sensing my presence he turned to look at me and let out a low whistle as his eyes travelled from the top of my head to my feet. I felt a blush rising to my cheeks as he said

"Neela, you look stunning... wow, I don't know what to say... I'm mush right now".

Of course he looked very handsome himself. He was wearing a pair of dark khakis and a tight fitted collarless shirt that hugged him in all of the right places, his chest and arms looked amazing in it. He held up a paper bag he was holding and said "I was ready early so I swung by the liquor store on the corner and picked up the wine" he set the bottle down as quickly as he had held it up and suddenly he was walking towards me as he licked his lips.

He was staring, I felt awkward and silly under his glare. He placed his hands on my hips when he reached me and looked me up and down again with a look of hunger in his eyes. Then he lowered his head to kiss me and we were suddenly in a heated moment all over again.

He was unstoppable tonight but I wasn't going to complain, I was just happy he seemed to be ready to take the next step even if his timing was not the best considering we were supposed to be at Jacey's place in about ten minutes. He broke the kiss and started to trail kisses down my neck and towards my chest as he softly said my name.

"Ray! We're going to be late..." I lamely attempted to thwart his efforts.

"Hmmm" he murmured seductively into my neck as he gently sucked on it and pushed me back against the front door.

"Hey, stop it you're gonna leave a mark... I don't want your mom to see me with a hickey!" I warned him as I pried out of his hold and he turned to look at me as he scratched the back of his head and made his face into a grimace, obviously not amused at the damper his mom seemed to have put on our evening.

"We'll be home soon right? We can pick up where we left off..." I urge him to start moving towards the car as I grabbed his shirt and pulled him towards me once more for another kiss, this time much softer and innocent before I turn and walked down the steps of the porch to the car.

"Alright, you win" he threw his hands up in a mock surrender motion as he followed me to the car.

The drive to his mother's place was a short one; she only lived ten minutes away. He had placed his hand on my knee as he drove and traced circles on it with his middle finger. His touch was driving me mad and apparently he was aware of this as he would glance over at me with his signature smirk from time to time as he drove momentarily taking his eyes off of the road.

_Restraint Neela_.

I reminded myself of my mantra as I shifted in my seat under his touch. I was clutching the wine bottle as though my life depending on it but it was the only thing keeping me from jumping onto Ray and having my way with him at that very moment.

"We're here" Ray announced unnecessarily as we pulled into the driveway and parked. He turned to look at me and I sensed just a touch of trepidation in his voice as he faced me in the darkness within the car. Then a smile slowly crept to his lips as he cocked his head at me noticing what was probably the look of fear on my own face in that moment.

"Hey, don't worry. It'll be fine, my mom loves you Neela... and so do I" he said comforting me as he cupped my cheek and ran his fingers through my hair.

"I know, but I guess I just have the jitters a bit from the thought of my first formal evening with the parents... you know what I mean" I respond.

"Yeah. I get it... well here we go" he said sympathetically as he began to exit the car.

I followed him to the front door and bit my lip nervously as he knocked on it. His mother's home was just a beautiful as his but appeared to be a bit older and had a more rustic feel to it. He turned to look at me while we waited and kissed the top of my head lovingly as he wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. The front door was barely open before I heard the voice of his mother.

"Oooh Hi kids, thanks for coming. Look at that you're right on time!" she exclaimed as she smiled at us before kissing Ray on his cheek and then pulling me into an embrace and giving me a kiss of my own.

"Neela, it's wonderful to see you again... please come in, here let me take that" she said as she grinned and helped me out of my shawl and hung it up in the hall closet. A middle aged man had made his way over too us and was looking at me with a welcoming smile on his face.

"Neela, this is my husband John" Jacey said enthusiastically as he came over to shake my hand.

"Hello Neela, nice to finally meet you. I've heard so many wonderful things about you. I hear you've finally come here to make an honest man out of Ray here." he joked with me as he took the wine bottle I was still clutching as a crutch out of my hands and thanked us for it.

Jacey pushed us into the dining room and seated us as John poured us some wine. I immediately sipped at my glass hoping a bit of wine would take the edge off of the nerves I was feeling about having this intimate dinner at Jacey's place.

Ray smiled encouragingly at me. His smile was enough to soothe me as he sat next to me and took hold of my hand.

"I set out some appetizers, thought maybe we could catch up for a while before dinner" Jacey suggested as she took a seat across the table from me and John settled into the seat across from Ray at the table.

"Neela, you look beautiful tonight" Jacey said sweetly as she smiled at me.

"Thank you" I managed to say softly as I felt the blush once again creeping across my face.

"She's a keeper isn't she" Ray kidded as he squeezed my thigh gently.

"So dear, I hear you've moved here and taken a position at the same hospital Ray is working at?" Jacey said but more so asked.

"Yes, I have. I've accepted a position in the surgical department" I said modestly as I looked between her and John. "That's wonderful. So the two of you... will be living together?" Jacey pressed on.

"Yes mom. That's the arrangement so far" Ray answered a little flatly warning his mother to loosen up on the line of questioning with his tone.

"Well, we're very happy for the two of you. I hope you're hungry, I've made us a bit of a feast tonight!" Jacey exclaimed picking up on Ray's cue she excused herself from the table to prepare the meal and bring it into the dining room. I offered my help even though I was not the best person to be in the kitchen. I thought it might be the right thing to do, and after all Jacey didn't know what a klutz I was when it came to preparing meals. Surely I could help her carry the dishes in at the very least.

As I got up to leave the table Ray squeezed my hand in a thank you. It was clear he appreciated my effort to spend some alone time with his mother. As we stepped into the kitchen my sense of smell was kicked into overdrive, something smelled absolutely decadent. I complimented Jacey on her cooking skills as we transferred the roasted chicken she had made as well as the mashed potatoes, corn and grilled vegetables into dishes to take to the dining room.

She smiled at me and and seemed to appreciate the compliment. She was looking at me a lot, observing me I suppose, my mannerisms and movements. I could tell she had something on her mind she wanted to ask me and I didn't take her for the kind to beat around the bush.

"Now, before we head back in there how about a little girl talk?" she said nicely as she guided me towards a seat at the kitchen table.

"Umm sure" I answered nervously.

"I appreciate that you've come out to be with Ray. I can see a difference in him already. Neela, he's so happy when he's with you, you open up a whole new side of him I haven't seen in years" she says as she reaches out to pat my hand on the table.

"However, I know things haven't always been easy for the two of you in the past. I'm just curious, what made you decide to leave everything and move here to be with my son?" she continues more seriously now.

"Uhh... I love him. I want to be with him" I respond quietly but I make sure to look her right in the eyes as I say this.

"Oh of course sweetie. I know that you two love each other very much. But my question is whether or not that will be enough? After all that has happened?" she asks concerned, she seems to be doubting our innocence and somewhat questioning our naivety.

"I certainly hope it is. This is the biggest decision I've ever made but I think it's absolutely the right one" I say affirmatively.

"Have you two spoken at all about getting married... what the future holds?" she asks apprehensively.

"No we haven't. I hope that will be in the near future for us" I answer as I smile to myself at the thought of being Ray's wife.

"I'm sorry to pry dear. It's just that he's been through so much; I've seen him go through so much pain not just physically but emotionally... I never want to see him like that again" she says now with tears in her eyes as she remembers the past.

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise" I say as I pass her a tissue which she uses to dab her eyes dry.

"I'm sorry... he's just, he's my only child and all I want is for him to be happy... he is my everything" Jacey says as she looks pleadingly at me.

"I understand, but I want you to know that I love him just as much" I respond softly.

"Good then." She concludes as she gets up and pats me softly on the cheek before we begin to carry the dishes out into the dining room.

I hear Ray say "Finally! Took you long enough" as we enter the room. He's glancing at me; he's worried about what his mother might have said to me in the kitchen no doubt. I smile at him hoping to convey that everything is fine and I squeeze his shoulder gently as I pass him to take my place at the table again. Dinner went well as we all got to know each other a little better. It seemed Jacey's mind had been set at ease after our woman to woman chat in the kitchen. The meal was scrumptious and delectable and I was on my third glass of wine and starting to feel its affect a bit.

Ray had been playfully rubbing my leg throughout dinner and a few times he had allowed his hand to travel to the top of my thigh teasing me with his touch in front of his parents. I would sternly push his hand away only to have him place it there all over again just a few seconds later. Whenever I would flash him a look of warning he would just smirk at me and cock his eyebrows up and innocently ask if everything was okay. We were all polishing off the last of our dessert when I excused myself to go to the ladies' room.

I heard Jacey pushing Ray to follow me and make sure I found it alright on my own. Jacey's home was much larger than Ray's and did consist of many winding halls and corridors.

I felt Ray on my heels just as I reached the washroom door he reached out and grabbed the handle and opened it for me and pushed me inside the room as he followed. He was on me in an instant, his lips pressed against mine as we kissed each other intensely. In one quick motion he put his hands around my waist and picked me up and sat me on the counter next to the sink without breaking our kiss. My legs were wrapped around his waist and I pulled him closer towards me as I tightened my grip on him with my legs. His hands were travelling up my thighs hiking up my dress as he squeezed my legs so hard I thought he might leave a mark.

I don't know if it was the wine or what for a moment I forgot where we were, but just for an instant. Suddenly it dawned on me what we were doing and I pulled back pleading with him

"Ray... we need to stop, your parents are in the other room!" I hissed at him just about a whisper as he stared at me breathing heavily.

"My mother is in the other room... and she was the one that sent me after you anyways" he corrected me.

"Yes, but only to help me find the washroom... I think we've got that part covered, they're probably wondering where you are!" I say looking around at the fact that obviously I had found the bathroom well enough on my own.

"So...who cares? Let them keep wondering" he says provocatively as he sucks on my ear lobe eliciting a slight moan from me. The wine has lowered my inhibitions and I'm tempted to give into him.

But this isn't where I want the first throws of passion between us to take place here in a bathroom at his mother's house with her in the next room.

"Hey, what happened to continuing this when we get home?" I ask in attempt to stop him.

"I can't wait" he offers quickly as he tries to kiss me again, but I turn my head.

"Ray, seriously. I can't" I say finally as he releases me and takes a step back. I'm still sitting on the counter now just staring at him.

"You're right... I'm sorry; I'll take it back a notch. We'll be home soon enough right?" he adds winking at me.

"Right" I answer as I smile back at him.

He smacks himself on the cheek and splashes his face with some cool water from the sink and pats his face dry with one of the hand towels as he attempts to compose himself again.

"Here" I offer as I hold my hands out towards him, he steps over to me and I adjust his shirt and straighten it up for him. I kiss him on the cheek as I hop down from my position on the counter.

"Kay, see you out there" he says as he squeezes my hip before slipping out of the room.

I exhale deeply as I lean against the back of the door waiting for my heart rate to lower before I head back out to face his parents.

* * *

The next half an hour went by quickly as we wrapped up our visit to his parent's place. We had seemed to speed through a few more glasses of wine, Ray had stopped after only two since he had to drive us home but I was on my fifth as least. As we said our goodbyes and stepped into the cool night Ray wrapped his arm around me as we walked to the car. Once inside he grinned at me from the side.

"What?" I asked concerned.

"Nothing" he said knowing he would drive me mad.

"No really Ray what?" I asked again.

"Well, they love you, its official. They could not stop singing your praises when I got back from escorting you to the washroom" he said with a grin.

"Oh escorting, is that what you call that? I hope you don't "escort" anyone else anywhere in that case" I teased back slapping him playfully on the arm.

"Oh no, only you of course" He joked back as we pulled out of his mother's driveway and headed home.

A short ten minutes later we were home again and Ray jumped out of the car and began to head inside without noticing my hesitation. I sat for a moment in his truck thinking about what was about to happen if Ray was serious about all he had said earlier tonight. We were finally going to make love; it was finally going to happen.

I was broken out of my daydream when I noticed him come back out onto the driveway and stand in front of the truck and spread his arms out at me with a confused expression.

"You coming?" he asked concerned as he opened my door and helped me out of the truck.

"Sorry" I slurred a bit as I fell into his arms.

"Neela Rasgotra, are you drunk?" he asked as he laughed at me and helped me back into the house.

"NO!... maybe a little, what? I was nervous about making a good impression... I'm just a little tipsy" I say feigning hurt at his comment.

"I know, I know... I'm just playing with ya" He says as he takes my hand and kisses it gently in the front hallway. I slip off my high heels and sigh in relief,

"Oooh thank god, I dunno how some women wear those all day" I groaned as I pad off into the kitchen for some water. Ray follows me in and stops in the doorway,

"Hey bring me up a glass too?" he asks as I gulp down my glass.

"Well here..." I say as I offer him some of mine.

"No that's okay; just bring me up a glass... I'll be upstairs, waiting for you" he flashes that mischievous grin at me and turns to leave the room.

"Okay" I mumble breathlessly after him.

So he hadn't forgotten, it seems as though it is really going to happen tonight. I'm feeling a little nervous, apprehensive and giddy as I climb the steps. My anticipation growing with every step I take as I get closer to his room.

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_K, promise the next chapter will be the big one, full of lots of love making! Probably will earn it an "M" rating. Please Review, I need your input on where to take it from here._


	13. Chapter 13

**This is the big one... definitely rated *M* ... don't say I didn't warn you... hee hee :P**

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I decide to stop in the bathroom to quickly brush my teeth and freshen up before I head into his bedroom. I can hear him rustling about in his bathroom as well. I look at my reflection in the mirror and smile back at myself. It seems Ray is ready to finally let me in and tonight will be the night we have both been waiting for, _for years now_.

When I'm finished, I step gingerly into his room and I am immediately greeted by him walking out of his bathroom now without a shirt on and he has changed in track pants. He is wiping his face dry with a towel and is unaware of my arrival. As he lowers the towel from his face he spots me and we lock eyes for a moment until I sheepishly say

"Here's your water" as I hold the glass up to him he walks over and stands very close to me as he drinks it down.

"Ah, just what I needed" he says as he lowers the now empty glass and we lock eyes again.

I bite my lip as I try not to stare at the physical wonder and beauty that is his tight chest, his strong arms, his lean torso...

"Why so quiet?" he asks softly as he looks down at me before turning to walk over to his nightstand to set down his empty glass.

"Uhh... hey no fair, you changed into something more comfortable" I whine as he plops down onto the bed and rests his hands up behind his head as he leans back against the plush pillows and flashes a grin at me,

"I did, sorry I was kind of hot" he says as he looks me up and down.

I'm still standing in the doorway, shifting awkwardly in my dress looking back at him.

"Well, are you gonna come in or what?" he kids with me as he pats a spot on the bed next to him.

"Yeah of course I was just thinking maybe I should change into something more comfortable too" I offer weakly as I walk over to the bed and take a seat on the edge of it.

_Why am I so nervous?_

"I think you look just fine the way you are" he whispers at me as he licks his lips.

"Oh really, easy for you to say, you haven't been the one wearing this vice-like corset thingy all night" I complain as he sits up and crawls over to me.

"Well I think I know how to fix that" he says sweetly as he begins to undo my zipper and runs it slowly down my back. I shiver at his touch his hands feel a bit cold on my exposed back. I stand to step out of the dress as it falls to my feet and as I turn around to face him I catch him taking in the sight of my newly exposed body.

I'm suddenly feeling very self conscious in my strapless bra and skimpy underwear as I stand before him next to the bed. In an instant he pulls me towards him and up onto the bed and we sit facing each other as he kisses me softly on the lips. I kiss him back but I'm euphoric and I feel like I'm having an out of body experience. He lays down over me and I feel him undoing the clips of my bra masterfully and he has it off within a second.

_So much for him being a little rusty in that department._

He's staring at me, and the new skin he's uncovered. He takes my breasts in his hands and squeezes them gently as he lowers his head over them and I feel his hot breath on me as I close my eyes and give into the moment. I want to remember every second of this. A moment later I feel his mouth on me as he slowly sucks on my nipple and nips at it playfully as his hands wander down to my underwear, he tugs gently on it and I raised myself up a bit so he can pull them down and off of me. He continues to play with my breast as he traces a circle around it with his tongue. I'm moaning in anticipation, yearning for him to take me right here and right now.

I reach for his pants and stick my hand below his waistband. My eyes fly open when I feel how well endowed he is as I gently rub my hand over what I find there. He stops what he's doing for a moment and our eyes meet and he smiles at me, that same mischievous grin he gave me earlier in the kitchen.

"You taste so good..." he whispers at me as he trails kisses down my breasts to my stomach. He licks the inside of my navel and I squirm it's a bit ticklish and I giggle a bit, he looks up at me and says "What?" rhetorically with a husky voice, full of passion. I pull him back up to me and our lips collide again and our tongues clash playfully as I begin to try to slip his pants down and off of him.

He's not wearing anything underneath them, no boxers, no briefs, _nothing_.

We struggle a bit and I manage to roll him over onto his back so I am on top of him, straddling him. I grin down at him as he seems a little caught off guard at my aggressiveness. He likes it though, that he's finally seeing this side of me, I can see it gleaming through his eyes. I snap the waistband of his pants and he bites his lower lip as we stare at each other. I gently continue to ease his pants off and he mimics my earlier move and raises himself up a little to ease my efforts. I have the pants down to just above his knees when he takes hold of my hands to stop me for a moment.

"Neela" he says breathlessly pleading with me.

I'm not sure if he's asking me to stop, or be careful or what. I look at him a little perplexed for a moment before I say

"Ray... let go" and he releases the gentle hold he has on my hands and gives in to the moment. He's smiling at me but I can tell he's not entirely at ease. I pull his pants down and off over his prosthetics. I remove his shoes. Then I begin to unfasten his prosthetics. He's staring at me intently, like a child waiting for his mother to tie his shoelaces or something like that. I'm just happy he's letting me do this at all. I remove his prosthetics slowly and smoothly one at a time and gently place them down on the bed next to us in case he should feel he needs them, I want them to be close by. I am no longer straddling him I'm just below him on the bed sitting up as he lays down in front of me. I run my hands down his legs until I reach his amputation sites. I feel him tense up as I touch him there. I focus on one leg at a time; I bend down and plant soft kisses over this special part of his leg, kisses I trail up towards his groin. I can feel his eyes on me; he has raised his head a fraction to watch every move I make as he continues to lie on his back. I kiss him from his hip inwards until he is inside my mouth. I lick and suck at him intensely. He's moaning now and pushing into me a bit as he runs his fingers through my hair and holds my head. He whispers for me to slow down or he may not be able to close the deal between moans and saying my name.

I finally remove my mouth from him and straddle him as he gently glides into me. We lock eyes as he enters me and the fit is perfect. We just stare at each other for a moment and he sits up a bit as I lower myself to him and we kiss deeply as he begins to thrust in and out of me while I weigh myself down into his thrusts. His hands are on my waist and he repeats my name over and over again just above a whisper. I'm moaning and writhing on top of him, running my hands over my breasts and up through my own hair as I relish in this moment of true love and passion. I raise his hand to my lips and suck on his index finger as I reach my climax. He reaches his end point a moment later after satisfying me and I fall down onto him and kiss his beautiful lips as we both pant and lay together for a moment before I remove myself from him and roll over to lie down next to him.

He's playing with my hair and we are both still trying to catch our breath as we lay holding each other in our afterglow. Things could not have gone any better, the moment we had both waited for so long was beautiful and intense and full of pent up passion just as it should have been. I run my hand up and down his chest and he stops me to pull my hand to his lips and kiss it.

"I love you" I whisper into his ear. He turns to look at me and traces my lips with his finger. His green eyes are deep and intense as he replies

"I love you more than you can possibly know" he kisses me softly on the lips and gets up to move his prosthetics, he props them up on the side of the bed. He lifts the covers and invites me under and I jump underneath them and snuggle up against him as we spoon each other. He kisses my shoulder and runs his finger tips up and down my arm from my elbow to my shoulder, that's the last thing I remember as I drift off into a peaceful slumber.

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_Okay, I warned you it was going to get a little hot and heavy. I'm thinking the next few chapters Neela sets up her new office and they both deal with the delivery of her stuff from Chicago and further adjust to living together. As always, I appreciate you ideas and reviews are much loved, special thanks to those of you that review each chapter and let me know someone is still out there reading this! :)_


	14. Chapter 14

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**Still Neela's POV:**

I awake the next morning to the sound of some rustling and movement, I think I hear some voices talking but suddenly it is quiet again. I stretch out and yawn tiredly as I roll over and notice that Ray is not in bed next to me. I glance at the alarm clock and it is ten o'clock.

_I really slept in._

Last night had been so beautiful and falling asleep in Ray's arms was absolute heaven. I can't believe I get to do that every night from now on. I decide to look for Ray as I slide of out bed and search for some clothing to cover my naked body with. I find one of his shirts nearby and slip it over myself. As I open the door of the bedroom and step out into the hallway I spot Ray in the spare bedroom across the hall surrounded by boxes thoughtfully scratching the top of his head as he contemplates the mess he is standing in the middle of. He turns to look at me and smiles,

"Well good morning sleepy head, you missed the movers" he says still smiling.

"I can see that, why didn't you wake me?" I ask feeling bad that he had to deal with moving in and sorting all of my stuff from Chicago.

"Well, you looked so peaceful I didn't want to disturb you, besides this is a man's job... I wouldn't want you to hurt yourself" he says as he winks at me.

"Oh really? Who do you think packed all of this stuff up?" I kid with him as I make my way into the room he is standing in and tug playfully at the bottom of the shirt he is wearing.

"I know, I know" he says as he leans in to kiss me on the lips.

"Neela, I had no idea you had so much crap!" he says jokingly as he scans the boxes that are now taking up most of the space in the room.

"I had them set up your bed and chester drawers and what not in the other spare room since it was empty and all... we can set up your desk in there as well, sort of like an office space for you" he says sweetly as he wraps his arms around my waist from behind and rests his chin on the top of my head.

"And I'm thinking with the extra bed set we now have another furnished room if we ever have guests stay over and what not" he continues "Since... of course my room is now yours as well" he finishes as I turn to face him and smile up at him.

"Wow, you've really thought this all out haven't you?" I ask him.

"Well, yeah I have. It's been in the back of my mind since you told me you were here to stay" he smirks at me and takes my hand as we leave the room.

"Nevermind all of this, we'll have plenty of time to unpack it all... let's get some coffee into you and some breakfast as well" he says as he playfully tousles my hair before we head downstairs.

"What no gourmet breakfast today?" I ask jokingly as we walk into the kitchen and I notice a paper bag next to two Styrofoam cups of coffee.

"Ah ha, you see I've already spoiled you beyond repair... I didn't have time to make anything before the movers got here so I just picked something up from the coffee shop on the corner... sorry boss" he kids as he hands me one of the cups and a bagel smothered in cream cheese from the paper bag.

"Ray, you should have woken me up, I could have helped with getting the boxes in..." I say looking down feeling a bit guilty that I had slept in.

"Don't worry about it, they did all of the heavy lifting I kinda just pointed them in the right direction" he says smoothly as he pulls me close and runs his hand up and down my back soothingly. We share a kiss before getting our coffee fix and enjoying our breakfast together.

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The next week went swimmingly for lack of a better word. Things could not have been more perfect. Ray and I just knew each other so well, we soon adapted our friendship to accommodate our love for one another and it all was such a perfect fit. I knew undoubtedly that I had made the right decision to move here and be with Ray. With each day that passed I became happier and happier that I had taken that chance and gotten on that plane.

Ray had gone back to work two days before I was scheduled to start at the hospital but he had insisted on helping me unpack my belongings, set up my bookshelves and unload my endless supply of medical textbooks. He had made room in his closet for my clothes, and asked me which side of the bed I preferred. He also made room in his bathroom for my endless supply of shampoos and soaps, he had lived with me before after all and seemed to know exactly what to expect. Everything was falling into place so well, I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. But soon realized that nothing would be going wrong, this was it finally, Ray and I were together and nothing was going to ruin it this time.

He had taken me out to a romantic dinner downtown, he referred to it as our first date and although we joked about it our relationship had followed a logical chain of events, initially. We were co-workers, then roommates, quick friends and then of course it got a little complicated. But that was all in the past and we spoke very little of the past except to reminisce about some of the good old days we had as interns and roommates. We were obviously in love with one another but we had not yet spoken of what the future held for us.

* * *

Before I knew it my week before starting at the hospital had ended and it was the night before my first day. Ray and I are sitting out on the front porch admiring the beautiful night sky. I have my feet resting on his lap and he is running his hands up and down my legs from my knees to my ankles.

"So, are you a little nervous about tomorrow?" he asks turning to look at me.

"A little, I think once I get my first surgery out of the way it'll all fall into place" I reply thinking about what the next day will hold for me.

"Oh and remember I need you to bring those boxes by my office when you have some time" I add looking back at him.

"They are already in my car, I'll bring them up on my break" he says grinning at me.

He has arranged his appointments for the next few weeks to resemble my schedule so we can spend time together at the hospital. I had told him that he didn't need to but he had insisted on it and truth be told I am glad. I will have someone to eat lunch with and most importantly I will get to see more of him. Despite all of the quality time we have been spending together lately I simply cannot get enough of him.

"I can't wait for you to meet my team, they're such great people" he says enthusiastically excited about me meeting the rehabilitation doctors and nurses at the hospital.

"Do they know about me?" I ask sheepishly.

"Well before you made your appearance yes they knew _of_ you, and now they definitely know _about_ you" he says as he squeezes my ankle.

"Oh really? I'm curious how will you be introducing me to them all?" I ask a little boldly putting him on the spot.

"Ah well you know I was thinking I'd just stick with the whole roomie thing" he jokes as I sit up and whip my legs off of his lap for a moment thinking he was actually serious.

"I'm kidding!" he quickly retracts his previous statement and he moves next to me and wraps his arms around me. He looks me right in the eyes and says

"How do you want me to introduce you?"

"Ah very clever, turn it around... I see what you're doing" I say as I look back at him.

"What?" he asks innocently.

"No really, friend, girlfriend, fiancée, future mother of my children... what do you prefer?" he says a mouthful and catches me a bit off guard.

"_Friend?!?"_ I grunt back at him in my shrillest voice.

"Hmm, I think I'm going to go with this is Neela, the most amazing woman I have ever met and will ever meet" he tries to win me back over again.

"I think you may earn some eye rolls with that one, I think that girlfriend will suffice" I offer back.

"Girlfriend, I dunno it sounds so high school though..." he states matter of factly.

"Yeah... Neela works too" I say giggling a bit at our silliness.

He's right though, after all we've been through the titles "girlfriend" and "boyfriend" simply cannot even attempt to describe what we are to each other, we're so much more.

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_A/N: Sorry for the lack of updates. I'm trying to come up with some fresh ideas to keep this story going now that all of the exciting stuff has happened... any thoughts would be appreciated, as always reviews are the bestest! :)_


	15. Chapter 15

**A bit of this chapter gets a little steamy so I'll say it's rated "M" just to be safe.**

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**Neela's POV:**

It was almost noon the next day and I had popped into my new office for a quick breather. The day had been quite busy so far and had started off with two minor surgeries for me to scrub in on. I logged onto my webcam for a video chat with the staff at County. I wasn't very technologically savvy but Jerry had talked me through the basics of using a webcam and I promised Sam and Morris that I would let them know how everything was going down in Louisiana as soon as I had a chance to.

Unfortunately neither of them were around today as they were participating in an event upstairs with some of the younger cardiac patients. I had been chatting with Frank for a while when Chuny and Gates happened upon our webcam session and joined in. I saw them motioning for someone else to come over as Chuny announced that they were chatting with me. Gates then announces to me that Simon is there. Suddenly Simon appears on screen.

It is a little odd seeing him again, and I try my best not to gloat in my newfound happiness so I speak in an even tone as I offer a weak smile at him,

"Hey there, this is my new home" I say as I turn and point over my right shoulder towards the space behind me.

"Impressive" Simon says as he continues to watch.

"Oh check this out" I say as I suddenly remember my new identification badge, I unclip it from my scrub top and hold it up towards the camera. Tony reads my title out loud and seems impressed.

"We get residents from Tulane, so I do have a faculty position!" I announce proudly as Ray enters my office his hands full with one of the boxes I had asked him to bring by from home.

"Well I'll be sure to tell Dubenko" Simon says as I grin back at them.

"I brought the stuff you wanted from home" Ray announces as I turn to look at him he turns around and glances at the computer

"Who you talking to?" he asks

"County" I respond

"Yeah?" he says as he ducks his head to get a better look at the screen and saunters over, I can't help but smile coyly as he reaches me and puts his hand over the back of my chair as he looks into the screen.

"Hey guys" he says as a huge smile crosses my face and I turn my attention away from Ray and smile back at the web cam.

"Hi Ray" says Chuny,

"Ray" Gates says pleasantly as he flashes a peace sign, we get a knowing smile from Frank and Simon nods silently in the background.

"Umm" I turn to glance at Ray again over my left shoulder and catch myself smiling again at just the sight of him.

"I'm gonna be late for the OR I just wanted to check in" I add as I smile again through my words.

"Call anytime" Frank responds.

"Yeah we miss you" Chuny adds,

"Take care" Simon says softly, and I can't help but grin back as I manage a weak "Bye" before we log off of our chat.

As I switch off the webcam and the computer screen Ray spins my chair to face him.

"You missing them?" he asks. He sounds concerned and a little hurt.

"No, well yes... but not like in a 'I wish I was still there' kinda way... I'm sorry am I making any sense?" I ask as I'm apparently at a loss for coherent words.

"Yeah, I think I know what you're trying to say... Simon looked kinda bummed out there" he adds.

"Well, that's not why I got in touch with them, you know that right?" I ask concerned.

"Yes Neela of course. I know. Hey, do you really have to report to the OR right now?" he asks changing topics as he squeezes my shoulder.

He's not worried about Simon. He knows that I'm here with him now. Forever.

"Not for about an hour, but I wanted to grab some lunch before I do" I reply as he leans in and kisses me gently on the lips.

"Well I was thinking we could eat together... in here... I can run down the cafeteria and pick us up something" he says, his tone is husky and sexy as he stands me up and takes my seat himself before he pulls me back down onto his lap.

I am now straddling him.

"Ray" I say sternly.

"What?... I locked the door, come on ... we have to, you know... break in your new office" he says suggestively as he kisses my neck his warm breath tickling me and heating me up in all of the right places.

"Come on... it's my first day. What if someone comes looking for me?" I plead with him helplessly but he's already lifting my scrub top up and off of my body.

I give in with little resistance.

"Then, we'll just have to be very quiet... and they will think you are not in here" he says softly as he runs his hands down my arms from my shoulders to my wrists.

"Uh huh" I reply as I begin to unbutton his jeans. He props himself up a bit so I can slide his jeans down until his boxers are exposed. I lower my lips to his and we kiss deeply as he moans into my mouth. He's expertly untying my scrub bottoms and I stand to step out of them as they fall to the floor I jump back onto his lap and he groans a bit, I'm suddenly well aware of his arousal beneath me. I rip off his t-shirt and throw it over my shoulders as I begin to trail kisses down his strong chest.

The moment is suddenly interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Doctor...?" I hear a voice through the door as I quickly pull my lips off of Ray's chest and rise to lock eyes with him.

He's grinning mischievously as he places his index finger over his lips and whispers at me to "Shush".

I open my eyes as wide as I can and glare at him as I hiss "I told you this would happen" I bite my lip and hold my breath.

"Neela, are you in there?" I recognize the voice, it's the head scrub nurse but I'm not sure why she's looking for me. There is a bit of movement then another voice outside my door.

"Hey Debbie, have you seen the new surgeon by any chance? I could have sworn I saw her in here a while ago" she says as the other voice responds

"Oh, no response? I guess we'll have to page her and let her know we bumped up the api surgery by half an hour"

"I guess so" and with that we finally hear footsteps retreating away from my door.

My pager on the desk begins to vibrate and slides off of the desk.

"You are a bad influence" I say playfully as I kiss him before I get off of his lap and begin to get dressed again.

"I seem to recall you saying that to me before... hey, so what that's it? You're just gonna leave me hanging here?" he says suggestively as I look up at him sitting there in his boxers looking sexier than ever.

"Honey, you heard them, I've got to get to surgery" I say as I toss him his shirt.

"Okay... fine" he says as he groans and puts it on. He stands and pulls his pants back up and fastens them.

"Hey" he says as he pulls me towards him for one last kiss.

"After you are done in surgery you wanna come down to physio so I can introduce you to everyone?" he asks hopefully.

"Yeah, of course... okay I'm off... I'll page you when I'm out of the OR" I say as I head out the door, I stop in the doorway and turn to look back at him.

He's running his hands down his face appearing to be trying to compose himself after our hot and brief yet unproductive encounter.

"Hey" I say grabbing his attention he drops his hands from his face and stares back at me.

"I love you" I say as I smile and look at him from the doorway.

"I love you too" he says as he fumbles a bit obviously caught off guard. He glances down at the ground introspectively and then back up at me and smiles.

I think he likes this new me. A me that would announce my love for him in the hallway at the hospital we both work at. A me that doesn't care what other people think. A me that loves him.

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**A/N: Thank you all so much for reading and reviewing! I really miss ER and Ray and Neela and am enjoying reading everyone else's stories. Hope you are enjoying mine!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Wow, sorry for the lack of updates. As always, I do not own ER or these characters... please don't hurt me.**

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**Neela's POV:**

My surgery ran a little longer than expected and it was half past four in the afternoon by the time I was able to scrub out of the procedure. I was tired, exhausted actually and quite hungry since Ray and I had never gotten around to that lunch we had been discussing earlier. As I changed out of my surgical scrubs in the surgeon's lounge I noticed my cell phone flashing. I had a text message from Ray.

_"Are you done yet? Waiting for you in the physio room..."_ it read.

A smile came to my face as I thought of him and his excitement about me meeting his co-workers and new friends. Since my arrival we had both been off in our own little world with little interaction with other people with the exception of his mother of course. As tired as I was I wanted to meet Ray's colleagues, I wanted to dig deeper into this wonderful new life he had created for himself. I grabbed my purse, shut my locker and headed for the elevator.

_"On my way"_ I texted back to him as I headed to the floor he was working on.

I stopped for a moment when I arrived at the physiotherapy room and just watched him in his environment. It seemed most of the physical therapy appointments were over for the day and Ray was throwing his head back in laughter as he spoke with another physician who looked to be about our age.

As Ray lifted his head he spotted me out of the corner of his eye and gave me a bit of a perplexed look as he perhaps wondered why I was just standing there. He waved me in encouragingly.

"Ahhh there's my better half" he said as he grinned at me walking towards them.

"Brian, this is our newest and brightest surgeon " he introduced me to his conversation partner.

"Neela please" I insisted as I extended my hand to shake his. He shook my hand and smiled warmly at me,

"Pleasure to meet you, it's nice to finally put a face to the name" he said as he shifted his gaze between Ray and I.

"Oh so someone's been talking about me, all good I hope" I joked as I raised an eyebrow at Ray.

"Of course... you really have a spell on my man here" Brian said as he patted Ray on the back.

I felt a blush rising to my cheeks as Ray and Brian grinned at me.

"Okay, no time to be shy... let me introduce you to the others" Ray said as he ushered me to the offices on one side of the room.

A small group of four people were casually chatting there. Brian followed us to the group.

"Everyone, I'd like you to meet our new assistant professor of surgery" Ray interjected as they turned to greet us.

"Hello" I half waved and nodded a bit awkwardly.

"This is Emma, Jake, Justin and Sabrina... my fellow PM and R residents" Ray explained to me.

"Lovely to meet you all" I replied.

"Likewise" Emma smiled warmly at me.

"You know, a smile has been permanently planted on Ray's face since your arrival" Justin joked and Ray blushed just a bit.

"So this is Neela, the Neela... from Chicago?" Jake asked as he smiled at me.

"Yes, the one and only" Ray replied as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder and squeezed it gently.

Sabrina remained quiet but I caught her stealing glances at me from time to time as the friendly banter continued between us all. After about ten minutes of small talk Ray leaned into me and whispered in my ear

"Okay, well you came, you saw, you met... I bet you are ready to call it a day?" as the conversation around us continued.

"Pretty much, I'm exhausted" I whispered back at him.

"Okay, no worries. Ladies and gentlemen, it's been a pleasure but I've gotta get my lady home, she's had a long day... as have we come to think of it. See y'all in the morning" Ray said to the group as he slipped his arm off my shoulder and reached his hand down to take a hold of mine.

"It was very nice meeting all of you, have a good evening" I said as they all bid their farewell to us and we turned to leave the room.

As we waited for the elevator, I still had Sabrina's odd reception of me on my mind and I decided to bring it up to Ray.

"So uh Sabrina was it?" I started pretending like I didn't remember her name.

"Yes?" Ray turned to look at me as he ducked his head and gave me that look where he raises his eyebrows waiting for me to continue.

"Uhh, oh nothing... I'm being silly" I decided to leave well enough alone.

"No wait, what were you going to say?" he pressed back.

"I dunno, I just didn't get a very warm vibe from her, that's all but maybe she's just the kind of person that takes a while to warm up to new people" I attempted to explain away my observation.

He shrugged his shoulders as the elevator arrived and offered a soft "Maybe" in reply.

As we stepped onto the elevator I turned to look at him,

"maybe...?"

"What, Neela... what do you want me to say?" he responded not making eye contact with me.

"Why are you acting so weird... kinda like a kid that just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar?" I asked confused.

"What? What are you talking about" he pursed his lips and blew air out them to mock my concern as thought it was completely unnecessary.

"Wait... did... oh" I didn't need to ask the question I was about to ask him, the answer was written all over his face.

"It was a long time ago, and it didn't mean anything... it only lasted six months... it was when I first started working here" he said softly as the elevator arrived on the ground floor and we began to step out of it and head for the parking lot.

_six months?!? _I thought to myself, _and it didn't mean anything?_

I was suddenly walking very quickly and was a few steps in front of him caught up in my own thoughts.

"Neela, wait up ... come on, you are not mad are you? Come on" he reached out and grabbed my arm and spun me around. We stood there for a moment in the hospital lobby right in front of the exit doors. I turned around and continued to walk out to the parking lot exiting the hospital.

"So, you just aren't going to talk to me? Is that it?" he said to my back as he followed me to the car.

"No... I just feel kind of stupid... I didn't want to have this conversation in the lobby of the hospital" I said as we finally arrived at the car.

The afternoon heat was still and muggy and I could feel a soft sweat start to break out all over my body. Ray unlocked the doors and we slid into the car.

"I didn't think it was important enough to even bother mentioning... obviously I was wrong" he offered quietly as he placed a hand on my thigh and squeezed it.

"Why didn't you tell me... that you were in a relationship with one of the other residents... was it serious?" I asked even though I didn't really want to know.

"About as serious as you and Gates maybe... or Simon perhaps" he quipped back, suddenly irritated by my line of questioning.

He had started the car and we had begun our drive home. His eyes were holding steady on the road and his jaw was clenched as I turned to look at him a bit appalled by his comment.

"I cannot believe you just said that" I spat out hurt.

"Oh so you can get all bent out of shape over something so stupid, but me I'm not allowed to ask you anything?" he said as he turned and looked at me with a look of hurt on his face.

"Well, how am I supposed to know it was something that didn't really matter when you never told me about it in the first place? I'm just wondering why you never said anything... a heads up would have been nice, that girl was practically shooting darts at me with her eyes" I shot back.

"Neela, please like I said before it was a really long time ago... she doesn't feel that way about me anymore"

"Really? I mean have you asked her lately? How did you two end things?"

"I'm tired, I don't want to do this right now" he replied back flatly.

"Fine." I was tired too and not really too sure why I had picked this fight with him.

Was I really angry about this past relationship that he hadn't disclosed to me no matter how irrelevant it was, or was I just looking for a crack in this wonderful foundation we had begun to lay out together?

Whatever the issue, Ray was right, now wasn't the time to hash this out. We had both had a long day, maybe over dinner after a nice warm bath. Yes definitely after a bath I thought to myself as I raised my hand to my aching and sore and neck and squeezed it to release some of the day's tension. He turned to glance at me as we pulled into the driveway.

"You okay?" he asked concerned.

"Yeah, nothing a hot bath won't cure" I said as I got out of the car and headed inside.

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**A/N: So I've been struggling a bit on where to take this story and if it should continue or not... now that all of the good stuff has happened I'm not really sure what to do with it...**


	17. Chapter 17

"I'll get started on dinner" Ray mumbled as he passed me in the foyer. I sat my purse down on the stairs, removed my shoes and headed upstairs.

I decided to use the main bathroom instead of the one in our room. It had a classic and beautiful deep bathtub that I loved to soak in from time to time. I lit a few candles and placed them around the tub as I filled it with hot water and then I undressed and slipped into the welcoming bath.

I could faintly hear the sounds of pots and pans clanging together downstairs. I worried that Ray might be taking some of his frustrations out on our, rather his cookware.

_What was wrong with me?_

_Couldn't I just leave well enough alone?_

_And what had he meant by that cutting remark with regards to Gates and Simon?_

I thought we were way beyond that now. Obviously he still harboured some resentment towards me with regards to the past. I inhaled deeply as I attempted to scrub away the day from my skin with my melon scented body scrub. I must have been in there almost half an hour, long enough that the water had began to get cooler when I heard a soft knock on the bathroom door.

"Hey you alive in there? Can I come in?" it was Ray.

Before I could respond he had opened the door and was walking towards me with a glass of wine.

"I thought you could use this" he said sweetly as he passed it to me.

_How did I become so lucky? _I didn't deserve him.

I tried to push the thoughts of my insecurities out of my mind as he stood before me staring at me intently.

"Thank you, you didn't have to do..." I started only to be cut off by him.

"I wanted to... dinner's just about ready" he gave me a tight lipped half smile as he sat on the edge of the bathtub. He dipped a few of his fingers down into the water and drew circles with them as we sat in silence for a bit. His back was turned towards me.

I closed my eyes and inhaled sharply before I spoke.

"You know the only reason I gave Simon a chance was because I thought you had moved on with this new girl you told me you were going to spend Thanksgiving with".

Silence.

"I thought that's it... now I've lost him forever... time to move on and try and attempt to find some kind of happiness without him" I continued.

"So that's it? I wasn't even worth fighting for? You didn't think it was worth mentioning how you felt... after all of that time?" he said sadly as he faced forward, still not looking at me.

I sat up, "Ray, of course I did... but you know me, I sometimes have trouble finding the words, and after that night at my apartment when you were in town for the conference and I asked you to stay but you declined... I thought you would reject me... tell me that shipped had sailed or whatever" I responded.

"I would hope that the fear of rejection would have been worth the risk if in the end you might have found out that I still wanted to be with you" he said in an even tone.

I took a sip of my wine, "I'm sorry... I guess that's all I can say now" I said quietly as I set the wine glass down on the corner of the bathtub and moved closer to him. I placed my hand on his waist and kissed him on his lower back through his t-shirt as he continued to sit on the tub edge. He turned to look down at me and stroked the top of my head and then he ran his fingers through my wet hair.

"I'm sorry that I was such an asshole in the car... I shouldn't have said what I said" he apologized.

"I think I may have deserved it" I replied flatly.

"Okay, if you say so" he kidded as he stood up and turned to face me.

"Asshole" I joked back as he grabbed my towel and signaled with his hand for me to get up and out of the bathtub. I stepped out and moved towards him.

"Come on now, dinner's going to get cold" he whispered as he used the towel to dry me off. He moved strategically, first tousling my wet hair with the towel then my back, my arms, my chest to my stomach and so on. He would touch each spot of skin after he had dried it, as though he was leaving his fingerprints behind or marking his territory. Whatever his intentions were he was driving me mad and I was practically shivering at his touch. As he dabbed my feet dry I was feeling butterflies swimming in my stomach as I usually did whenever he was in such close proximity.

"There" he said tossing the wet towel down onto the floor and passing me my bathrobe. He leaned in and gave me a soft kiss on the lips as I put it on.

"I'll see you downstairs in a bit?" he asked as he left me wanting more.

"Yes" I replied just above a whisper as I felt his warmth disappear from in front of me as he made his way out of the bathroom. I sat down on the edge of the bathtub for a moment to gather myself. I chugged down the rest of my wine as well.

Ray Barnett never ceases to amaze I thought to myself as I replayed our interaction in my mind relishing in his gentleness, his care and concern for me. In one small gesture he had voiced his concern, offered his apology and reconciled our argument. As I headed to the bedroom to get changed I felt a tinge of guilt over my immaturity earlier today at the hospital. _What did it matter if some girl Ray dated for a while shot dirty looks at me? Does it really matter?_ Ray was with me now and it was becoming increasingly clear that I had blown the situation out of proportion and handled it like a teenager.

I slipped on a tank top and a pair of comfy capris, the house was humid still holding in the heat of the day. I ran a comb through my wet hair and let it fall loose and wavy over my shoulders. A quick check in the mirror before I headed downstairs. Even though we had lived together before, things were just different now. I caught myself checking my appearance in the mirror more often then I'd like to admit. As I headed downstairs and into the kitchen Ray had just finished setting the table and was sitting down to wait for me to join him.

"Hey... sorry, it's just spaghetti and meatballs, best I could do today... we really have to do some groceries" he said as he greeted me.

"Smells delicious, I'll swing by the store tomorrow and get the shopping done" I said smiling softly as I sat down and began serving myself some food.

"Mmm hmm, well I better come you know just to make sure we actually get real food, stuff to cook you know... not just frozen meals" he joked with me.

"I promise no frozen food" I winked back.

We sat there eating for a moment and then Ray perked up as though he suddenly had some news to share with me.

"Hey, I forgot to mention I got an email from Brett today, turns out he and Nick are passing through Louisiana... some kind of road trip or whatever they wanted to pop by for a visit and catch up" he said lighting up a bit.

"Really? I didn't realize you still kept in touch with them... that's great it'll be nice to see them again... my it's been a long time" I said grinning reminiscently.

"Yeah it has" Ray chuckled to himself as he too stepped back in time for a moment remembering his rock star days.

It had only been a few years ago, but our year as interns, the year we met seemed like it was a million years ago. Yet here we were together, in love, no one could have predicted this ending I'm sure of it, not even us.

"So uhh they will be here for a weekend or whatever, I told them they could crash here... hope that's okay?" he asked looking at me expectantly.

"Yes, of course... Do they know we're umm..." I trailed off as I used my hand express my thoughts as I fanned it back and forth between he and I in a fanning motion to implicate us being together.

"Oh uh, no... But I will give them a heads up... wouldn't want them to think we were still just roomies" he replied as we both giggled a bit.

"That would be funny, can you imagine if they thought were still just flatmates?" I tapped the table as I laughed.

"Man, I can't wait to see the look on Brett's face... he always thought there was more to our relationship than either of us were letting on... now he's really gonna think there was some monkey business going on back during our Wicker Park days" Ray smirked at me.

"Really? You never told me he thought that" I asked but more so stated.

"Well, yeah. At the time it made me kind of uncomfortable... I mean when he suggested it, I told him the truth of course, you know that nothing was going on... but they were all quite enamoured with you Doctor Neela... you have no idea how much slack I got for not... well to use their exact words 'hitting that' back then" he laughed as he caught the look of surprise on my face.

"You better stop! Sometimes it's better not to know what people really think... How am I going to face them now?! I'm so embarrassed; really they spoke about me like that?" I replied as I felt a blush rising to my cheeks.

"Oh yeah... you definitely had them hooked after you told them you played the viola" he joked as I whipped a piece of spaghetti at him.

"Hey!" he exclaimed.

"Shut up" I said as I shot him an embarrassed look.

Silence fell upon us again as we both smiled to ourselves and continued with our meals. A glass or two of wine later and we were finally finished eating and I got up to clear the table when he stopped me and took hold of my hand.

"Leave it, we can do it later... it's a beautiful night, let's go sit out on the porch" he said as he picked up the bottle of wine.

"Okay" I smiled as I picked up our glasses and followed him out.

We took a seat on the wicker bench and looked up at the stars. Ray moved in close to me and put and arm around my shoulder. He kissed the top of my head. A shiver coursed through my body.

"Cold?" he asked looking down at me,

"No... Perfect" I answered as I traced circles on his thigh with one of my fingers.

After a few moments of bliss later I felt the need to break into our comfortable silence.

"Ray?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry for the way I threw a bit of a hissy fit today over you and the whole Sabrina thing".

"That's alright, and totally understandable... I noticed the looks she was giving you, truth is I was just hoping you didn't" he cleared his throat somewhat uncomfortably after his statement.

I sat up and pulled away from him and turned to look at him as I playfully punched him in the arm.

"Ouch, hey!"

"You mean, you noticed and you were just hoping I didn't... how could I not!?" I spoke sarcastically to him.

"Truth is, I hate to admit it but she knows a bit more about our past than I'd like to have disclosed" he started.

"I'm listening..." I urged him to continue.

"Well, she was just a student and then an intern when I first came home and started my rehabilitation. She saw it all, the blood the sweat and the tears. I wasn't working with her but I noticed her watching my sessions and one day she approached me and we got to chatting. Before I knew it we were talking for hours every day after my sessions and she would come home to my mom's place and stay for dinner and we would just hang out. Unfortunately you weren't exactly my favourite person then and well... she got the whole back story... a one-sided story of course but our story nonetheless" He bit his lip as he looked at me apprehensively.

"Ahhh, well that explains it" I sighed heavily.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, truth is Sabrina and I have grown apart over the last year or so... she hasn't had a chance to hear all about me and you reconciling and this new start and all... so I can only assume it caught her a bit off guard to see you there in person in the flesh today" he continued.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure"

"How did it end... I mean six months is kind of a long time"

"Well, I think we were more friends than anything else, at the time I could tell she wanted more but I needed to focus on my recovery, the last thing I had time to worry about was someone else and their needs... if you know what I mean...so I broke it off"

"Yes, of course I understand" I kissed him on the cheek.

"What was that for?" he asked grinning at me.

"For being you" I smiled back at him. He leaned in to kiss me deeply and I broke away from him after a few minutes.

"Come on, let's go to bed" I pulled him up off of the bench and we headed inside.

**

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A/N: Thank you to everyone that is continuing to read and review, you're the best! I will try to keep going for you, got a few ideas now, like the whole Brett coming to visit thing and all... what do you think?**


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